


Fortune

by GloomyAutumn



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Drama & Romance, F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-04
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:47:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 30,904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26282899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GloomyAutumn/pseuds/GloomyAutumn
Summary: Two completely different girls find themselves in the same place. The only thing they have in common is one thought: "Luck doesn't exist". (Catradora AU)
Relationships: Adora & Catra (She-Ra), Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Comments: 43
Kudos: 97





	1. Two Sides of the Same Coin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prologue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter while listening to "Kiss" and the name of it comes from their song "Two Sides of the Same Coin" from their album "Unmasked".

# Chapter 1 – Two Sides of the Same Coin

**Adora**

What kind of inclination did stupid people have to say that, just because a day was sunny and fresh, it was an excellent day?

No tragedy in the entire history of humanity had ever happened in days like that?

Was that movie cliché in which everything bad happens at night or under the rain actually true?

Of course not! It was nonsense. The damned optimists wanting to find a reason to be happy despite their lives being a disastrous failure. Looking for reasons to smile despite any bad thing that could happen to them.

But no one had worse luck than Adora. So bad was her luck that she had even stopped believing in its existence long ago and had started hating everyone who, in the most stupid way, still believed in it.

But of course luck doesn’t exist! It was all simply a reaction to another one of our actions, just as Newton had said centuries ago.

You couldn’t win the lottery without having bought a ticket before. Getting a good job was not linked to luck, but to knowledge and contacts. Yes. Luck doesn’t exist.

Or at least that’s what she wanted to believe because, if luck really exists, then she had the worst luck of all, without reason and completely powerless to change it.

Long ago she stopped thinking about luck and started blaming herself for any and every bad thing that happened to her in her life. Everything had a logic explanation, as hurtful as it was sometimes.

Unfortunately, her life was filled with little bad moments that happened because of things she didn’t do or in which she was not even present. Little ghosts from the mistakes her parents had made and that manifested to make her trip whenever she thought she could start running. And she couldn’t blame her parents. It was not like they agreed to die in a car accident when she was barely five years old. No. It was something that simply happened. Bad luck, everyone said, but it was simpler than that; if her father had not been a very enthusiast alcoholic, they would both be still alive and her life would probably be a lot simpler. Maybe she would be able to actually live instead of surviving as she had been doing since they died.

Her grandmother (her mother’s mom) Razz, had taken care of her in spite of what everyone told her about her old age to raise children and the fact that she didn’t really have much money for herself even. She could still remember with sadness those days in which her grandma went to bed without having dinner just so she could have three meals a day. “I’m not hungry, dear”, her grandma told her, but she knew the old woman was starving.

She remembered with mixed feelings the tears that ran down her grandma’s eyes when she got home one day with the paycheck of her first job. It wasn’t a big deal, but it was enough for them to have three meals a day both.

She would never forger, always remembering them with shame, those moments in which she threw a tantrum for a silly thing, without thinking about how her grandma gave everything she had for her.

And of course, she would never forget the worry her grandma had on her face when she told her she would be starting college.

Of course, after so many years of experience, even without knowing the theory as a college student might know, she had managed to get a pretty good position in the company, but not with a great paycheck as if she had that stupid paper to back up her knowledge. Still, it was enough for her to go to college. At a night school, but yet, she wanted to get her degree.

Probably paying for tuition would make it hard for her to have breakfast or dinner in next few years to save more money, just in case, but she knew it was worth it, and her grandma knew it too.

Even so, her grandma had tried to convince her to do something else.

She had been born in a different country where her father came from and she had the citizenship of that country, one that was way better than the one she lived in, or so everyone said. Her grandma had told her to find her dad’s family and ask them for help, but her pride wouldn’t allow it. After all, they never seemed to care about her.

Once her money had been enough to cover all her expenses, her grandma’s retirement money was enough for her as well. Not enough to pay for luxuries, but it was enough for a life without needs. That was why, when she had told her about her idea of going to college, her grandma had suggested her to instead go to that country that had nothing for her.

“Find your family there.” She had told her. “Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine on my own.” But it was impossible not to worry.

Yes, maybe studying at that “magical” country was actually better than doing it in Brightmoon, but she couldn’t just leave alone the woman that had given everything for her. She couldn’t leave her now. Not when she had started to have episodes of Alzheimer and they were getting more frequent by the day.

Maybe during the week she would only be home to sleep, but on weekends she would be there for whatever her grandma needed. She had to make the most of the time she still had with her, knowing that maybe it was not much. Not a lot of people lived past their nineties and she was way past them.

Of course she knew that the future would be difficult and that this was just the beginning of a long trip, that’s why she couldn’t say she wasn’t terrified.

She thought about everything that could happen. She knew she could even get yelled at her job if she attempted to do homework there and she knew that she could get behind of schedule too.

Yet, despite adversity, she stood firm by her decision. Determined to succeed but ignorant to everything that was about to happen. Things far more complex than any school project or work and a lot more stressful than her boss yelling at her, but it was unavoidable.

* * *

**Catra**

The day was beautiful. Birds singing, sun shining and a perfect breeze.

Unfortunately, that was not enough for Catra, who couldn’t stop thinking about the words a son of a bitch had told her at that party she had attended with her father the previous night.

“You’re a really lucky girl.” The overweight and completely bald man had told her. Well, at least she was luckier than him, she had thought with sarcasm.

What made that dumb ass think that luck even existed? That was something that dumb people invented to avoid the responsibility of their actions when things didn’t go right or to try to be humble when something went right.

She hated the stupid idea that people had about luck. She hated the word itself. That damned word that took away the merit of everything she could accomplish in less than a freaking second. Those words that made her look as if she never had to do anything and everything would be there for her so that she could just take it.

Luck had not given her those excellent grades at school. She got them by studying hard.

Luck had not given her a standing ovation during her first piano recital. Long hours of practice to master the instrument had.

Luck had not given her anything and yet it took away everything.

Everything she set her mind to, she always accomplished it thanks to her hard work and perseverance, so much that people called it stubbornness.

Only once had she failed and that had been enough to shatter the image her parents had of her.

In the middle of her entrance exam to college she had left the room due to a pretty aggressive stomach infection and she obviously failed the test.

Dishonor painted her parents’ faces as they whimpered loudly.

His father, Hordak, yelled endlessly for hours about how that had to be a bad joke. He didn’t hesitate telling her about everything he had provided her. All the money he had spent in her and everything he expected in return. All the things she didn’t really care about.

In the end, she didn’t want to be a boring computer engineer. And yes, it would be the best if she wanted to inherit her father’s company one day, but she didn’t. She would rather live under a bridge than having a boring job like that one, she just couldn’t oppose her father.

At least until that day, when she finally returned the treatment and yelled at him, which only made him angrier than before and it all ended in a senseless yelling that only ended once her father grew tired of it and just told her: “As long as you live in this house, you will live by my rules. Do as I say when I say.”

From that day on, their parents lost that little toy they bragged about so much. She was no longer the topic of conversations, something she was grateful about, wondering sometimes if maybe now her father spoke about his alcoholism or if her mother told her friends about that dance teacher that gave him private lessons whenever Hordak wasn’t home.

She didn’t care about any of that, but she knew that her father had a point in telling her to keep studying.

Knowing that he would never let her study music as she had always wanted to, she decided to take the easies road to finishing a career and getting her degree, start working and finally leave her family aside, those hypocrites who only cared about you if you had money to burn. And so, she took the scholarship from a college that offered it to her thanks to a recommendation letter.

Obviously, money was not a problem. The scholarship was unnecessary. She just took the offer because, thanks to the recommendation, she would not have to take another exam. The easiest way.

Maybe it was not what her father wanted. Maybe it wouldn’t give her money like her father had made, but without a doubt, it was something that gave her a strange feeling of freedom, being the first decision she had taken by herself without having to ask for permission to the patriarch whose word was absolute.

As she thought about it more, she couldn’t hide the excitement that brought her to think about a future in which she would finally be completely free of her father’s grip.

She wanted to feel what real freedom felt like and not that façade she lived for years. That one that didn’t allow her to have a boyfriend when she wanted. That one that left her without real friends, since everyone she knew were just masks that stayed put as long as you had the money to sustain them.

Entering that small college of no renown would be a great opportunity to meet people with lives completely different than hers. People who could teach her thousands of things. Even though those thoughts came with a really awful truth: She didn’t know how to get along with people in a “normal” way. She had never done that before. Her mask had always been there for everyone to see her strength and value without letting her be… well, herself. 

She asked herself if maybe because of it she would be unable to make friends, maybe even a boyfriend. She really wanted to experiment all kind of normal feelings and not just the ones her father had made up and installed in her during her whole life.

With all that in mind, she kept thinking about college all day long, hoping that everything would go better than expected. Unaware of what was waiting for her there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, yeah. I'm finally writing a new story. I had a couple of ideas besides this one (I'm still thinking about making the second part for my previous story, "Pentagram", and I had another really dark AU) but I decided to go with this one because it's the shortest one (I have it all in my head, but I don't think it will take more than 10 chapters to finish it, we will have to wait and see how thoughts translate to words, hahaha).  
> This chapter is basically just a prologue for the story and it will be starting fully next week (or maybe even earlier if I find the time).  
> The story is also being published on Fanfiction at the same time (I don't know if that's like, allowed or something, but I felt like I had to say it, hahahaha).  
> Also: I just recently made a twitter account for all that content I can't share in my real social media accounts (because I have my boss, coworkers and family there and I would like to avoid discussions about my life choices, hahahah) so, if you want to follow me, just search @gloomy_autumn and you will immediately see my awful art (I recently started drawing again after 10 years of not doing so) and all the retweets I do about Catradora and other ships I'm into.  
> I hope you like the concept I'm making here! See you next week!


	2. There Must Be a Better World Somewhere

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The girl's first day of college.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter while listening to BB King, the title comes from the song "There Must Be a Better World Somewhere" from the selftitled album.

# Chapter 2 – There Must Be a Better World Somewhere

**Adora**

Everyone who thought today was a beautiful day could go and eat shit! They couldn’t be more wrong. Or at least for Adora, today had been a pretty horrible day.

It all started with a dead phone. The little piece of shit didn’t charge at all and, in the middle of the night, it just went off, which caused her to be late to work and get yelled at like never before. If that was not enough, she also missed her lunch break. It was either that or she would have to stay overtime after her shift to finish her work, but she couldn’t do that. Not today when she was supposed to start college. She couldn’t be late on her first day and she could certainly not miss it.

Just when she got out of the office, she was taken by surprise by a call from her girlfriend, Lonnie. It was not as if they didn’t call each other regularly, it was just that she had been pretty quiet lately and, in that moment, she found out why. She broke up with her in a phone call. What kind of person did that kind of cowardly act!? Honestly, that bothered her more than the fact that their relationship was over. In the end, the love they once had, had faded away slowly and they hadn’t broken up before because they were used to each other, even if they had no feelings anymore.

And if that was not enough, a little summer rain took her by surprise too, just a couple of blocks away from the college building, with nothing to cover herself up, making her run towards the building for refuge and, once she was inside it, the rain had stopped suddenly. She could only be thankful that she didn’t have to run in heels. She had stopped wearing them long ago because they were just a big pain in the ass. Just regular shoes complimented her work suit.

At the college’s gates, a guard asked her for the ID she was given and, once she showed him the little plastic rectangle, he showed her how to use it to get pass the turnstiles by putting it on the card reader at the top of them. 

Realizing that she still had more than twenty minutes before she had to go to her first lecture, she went to the cafeteria and sat in an empty table to eat her lunch, completely cold, in less than ten minutes, eating like an animal because of her hunger. She then went out of the cafeteria and took out a cigarette from the box in her backpack, trying to calm the nervousness and stress she had went through the day.

As she smoked, she looked at the scenery that surrounded her. Three buildings aligned, five floors each. To their left, some fields for different sports were now empty and to their right, the cafeteria where she had been finally able to eat something. Behind the buildings she could see a parking lot with quite a few cars still on it.

Once she was done smoking, she took out a little paper from her pocket in which she had her schedule written. Her first lecture was “international laws”, building two, floor three, classroom 310. Pretty random if you asked her, but not important. She started walking towards the stairs and saw an elevator next to them, so she decided to use it. There was no way she would be using the stairs if she had that alternative now. Not after the day she was having.

She entered the elevator as soon as it opened its doors and, just before they closed again, a girl with long, black hair and mismatched eyes, a little bit shorter than her, put her hands between the doors, making them open again as she quickly entered without saying anything and not looking at her, as if she had gone inside her house, something she thought was kind of rude.

Through Adora’s mind a lot of things passed by, like: “ _what a self-centered bitch_ ” or “ _she has to be one of those girls who think they deserve it all just because she’s beautiful_ ” and some other things like that, until the beep of the elevator took her out of her thoughts, seeing that she had arrived to the floor she wanted.

The black haired girl got out of the elevator first and she went behind her. They both walked towards the first door they could see and looked at the classroom number it had. Once they saw it had the number 302, they went separate ways.

 _“I hope she’s not a first year in the same course as me. I wouldn’t know how to treat a little princess like her, let alone knowing how to deal with that ego of her if we had to work together_ ”, Adora thought as she read the numbers in each classroom she passed. Once she realized she was going in the wrong direction because of her thoughts, she went the other way, where she saw the black haired girl entering a classroom. “ _Please god, not that one_.”

And her luck, imposing as always, took her to the same classroom where the other girl, her classmate apparently, had gone inside.

She looked everywhere in the room, thinking that maybe she could find a known face, but she had no luck in that, so she proceeded to find an empty seat as far as she could from little miss princess, and ended up seating in the furthest area of the classroom, where she couldn’t even be sure if she would be able to hear the professor.

She looked around and saw that there were not a lot of people in there, just like ten people, and thought that it was because maybe some of them hadn’t arrived yet, but the bell that announced the start of class took her out of her thoughts again, making her look at the door, curious about what kind of person her first college professor would be like. She had always heard that cliché of professors in college being old people with great wisdom or the ones that were always trying to be funny and failed miserably.

Soon enough, a tall, bald man with a prominent belly and dressed as any other student who didn’t really care about life and dressed like vagabonds entered the room with a few things in his arms, surprising her when he actually left his stuff in the professor’s desk. For a second she thought he couldn’t be the professor, but it turned out to be him. College was going to be weird, it seemed. 

“Okay so, I see eleven people now and according to my list, we’re all here, so let’s start.” The, apparently real teacher, started to speak. “I would like to hear a brief introduction of yourselves, please start here.” He signaled the little princess and she quickly introduced herself. “Catra. So, you’re the one who earned that recommendation letter for her great grades, right?” She saw the dark haired girl just nod with disinterest before the professor spoke again. “Nice. It’s not as easy as it is to say it. You must be pretty smart.” The girl just stood there without saying a word as everyone looked at her. It was as if she was used to the attention. “Well then, let’s keep going…”

As everyone introduced themselves, Adora thought that maybe she had misjudged the girl. Maybe she just had a bad day just like herself or maybe she just misjudged her to take out all the poison she had accumulated in her through the awful day. Either way, it was wrong to judge her without knowing her.

* * *

**Catra**

Days as bad as this one happened more often than before recently, especially for Catra, whom, in an attack of misplaced euphoria, had gone against everything her parents wanted and expected for and from her.

Not only had she decided to accept the recommendation to that unknown college, but she also had signed up for the night classes under the excuse that it would be so that she could study another language during the day. Being prolific in Spanish and Italian as she was in her native language, her parents believed her and, even if they were not convinced about their daughter making the right decision, they let her do it. “ ** _She’s already eighteen years old. Let the girl take her own decisions, but no crying once she realizes she’s making a mistake_** ”, her father had said at dinner the day before.

Truth is, the thing about learning another language was a complete and utter lie. Yes, she had signed up for French lesson, but she took the night classes at college so that she could also take guitar lessons, the only instrument she had actually wanted to learn and the only one her father had refused. Not impressive enough for those whose asses get licked by him.

It would probably be extremely difficult to do all things at once, more so since she would have to buy a guitar and then bring it home without anyone seeing it. Unfortunately, that was the way it had to be. She even decided to buy an electric guitar so that no one could hear her practice, in spite of her actually wanting to buy a classical guitar since Spanish “flamenco” had always been one of her favorite genres in music.

The first Monday with all her new activities started pretty awful. Just one hour of French and she already wanted to drop it. Not because it was difficult for her, it was because she knew she had only signed up in it to have an alibi every time she got out of home to go and take her guitar lessons. That, sadly, made the French lessons a complete pain in the ass. Even more so knowing that the time to play her guitar would come and she would finally be able to learn it.

And so, as soon as the French lesson was done, she ran out of the building as if she were a bullet. She called her personal driver, Scorpia, to pick her up and to finally take her to the place where she really wanted to be.

Scorpia was an old woman (at least for her) in her thirties. She didn’t know her exact age since she never wanted to ask, knowing how it was a sensitive subject for some people. Scorpia had been working as her driver for almost ten years now, when her mother “finally” realized that it didn’t make sense for her and her driver to pick her up from school if they could simply send someone else while they had some fun through the day. Since then, Scorpia had been the closest thing she had had to a real friend and more so, a real mother. Scorpia cared for her and her happiness, really cared. She was even willing to take the blame if, by chance, at any moment, her father decided to look at the car’s GPS he had installed and saw that there was a suspicious route in their travels. Unlikely since, in all the years she had had a driver, he had never done it. But still, the big woman was prepared for it.

Scorpia took her, smiling happily for her, genuinely, to the music conservatory where she went in as fast as she could, a little nervous but exited, and mostly happy as she hadn’t been in a really long while, which was kind of sad.

Happiness faded away quickly as she was told about how her teacher wouldn’t be able to come that day due to personal reasons and that there was no one else to cover for him that day. She was told to come back the next day when they assured her, the teacher would be present now.

There were a lot of things that made her angry (aside from her parents), and one of them was her plans getting ruined for something she couldn’t change, like this very thing.

And oh God, she was mad! She knew it was worth nothing getting mad at that, but it was impossible not to be.

Scorpia tried to calm her, explaining to her that maybe something bad happened to someone close to her teacher, but when Catra was mad at something, there was nothing in the world that would take away her spoiled mood during the day. It would go away once, the next day, all her plans happened just like she expected and wanted, but for now, nothing could be done.

When she got home, she entered as silently as she could, trying to avoid being found out. She carried the guitar in a position that made it easier to hide in case someone just suddenly appeared in front of her and she walked close to furniture to have a place to hide it quickly.

Once she heard the noises that, unfortunately weren’t estrange to her, coming out of her mother’s room, she knew she had nothing to fear. Surely the maid and the cook had been sent outside in an “errand” while Mrs. Weaver finished playing with whomever was in there with her. It was disgusting.

She got into her room and left the guitar under the bed, where she knew no one would see it. She took off her shoes and her jacket and just threw it away in a chair near a desk. It was a little after noon and she felt the tiredness of two days together. Maybe getting so angry had made her more tired than she should have been. Maybe it was just her life. Who knew?

She took a nap for a couple of hours and then tried to practice with her guitar by herself for another hour before going to college. Her fingers kind of knew what to do thanks to her time playing piano, but still, not knowing exactly what to do with them proved to be an impediment.

She took a bath before going to college, expecting it to lower her bad mood since her little nap proved to be useless in achieving that, and even with a warm bath just the way she liked it, her sour mood was still there. Maybe after everything went right in college she would be able to get rid of her anger. At least she hoped so.

Scorpia took her there, leaving her just outside where the guard at the entrance got close to her to ask for her ID. She showed him the plastic thing and he told her how to use it to enter through the turnstiles.

Once inside, she went to the administrative building to get her schedule since she didn’t have it yet. When she got out of it, she took a look at the whole place but the only thing that caught her eye was a blonde girl smoking as she seemed to be lost in her thoughts. A pretty girl, no doubt, but her beauty was dulled by an act as vulgar as that one... No! That was how her father thought and it was disgusting to think like that. And just that little thought made her even angrier.

She sat in one of the benches in the patio and kept looking at the smoking girl, imagining how her life could be like. Maybe plain and boring like it usually was. A middle class family in which she never had any needs but she was not always able to have luxuries. Maybe she was just like her, someone who had had it all except for the only thing she ever wanted; the love and unconditional support from her parents. Maybe she was one those girls who made a living at night and she studied to get out of it, sick of that lifestyle already. Maybe none of it was true, but she liked to do that sometimes; imagining someone else’s life.

She suddenly saw the blonde starting to walk towards the buildings and looked at her wrist watch, realizing that it was almost time for class to start, so she got up and walked quickly towards the elevator where the other girl had gone in. She didn’t want to wait for it to go up and down again and she sure as hell didn’t want to go up the stairs right now.

She was later surprised to see the same girl entering the classroom she was in after she had gone into a different direction, but she didn’t pay it any mind. She probably owed her an apology for stopping the elevator as suddenly as she had done but, at least today, she didn’t even want to talk to the professor. Maybe tomorrow… or maybe they could just forget about it…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm finally done with chapter 2!  
> If you read my previous fic, "Pentagram" you already know I really like to build things up, but don't worry, I always deliver on the Catradora we all want.  
> Also, I'm making these chapters shorter than the "Pentagram" ones because 3k words per chapter was a real pain in the ass sometimes.  
> A little note about the elevator thing: I don't know how things are in a lot of countries, but here in Mexico it's very rude (like, really, really rude) to do that and if you do it, you have to apologize to whomever was inside the elevator already.  
> Anyway, chapter 3 will be ready withing a week (maybe earlier if I can stop procrastinating).  
> I hope you're enjoying the story so far and don't forget to follow me on twitter where I'm embarassing myself by posting my drawings whenever I can: @gloomy_autumn  
> See you!


	3. Don't Say Anything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adora has a chat with her ex-girlfriend.   
> Catra is preparing for the worst.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter while listening to Sleeping With Sirens and took the title from their song "Don't Say Anything".

# Chapter 3 – Don’t Say Anything

**Adora**

After the awful Monday from the week before, the rest of the week had gone by without any other trouble. The usual. Nothing bad, but nothing good. So monotonous that a lot of people would say it’s boring, but for her that was the ideal. She liked her boring life and would rather live with nothing good happening to her since, every time it happened, something bad would come along and it would hurt more. The most outstanding thing of her week was that she made some overtime at work on Saturday.

But everything good tends to end, and so, it ended soon.

On her second week of school, everything went by pretty good on Monday. A couple of assignments that would take a few hours of her sleep or would make her eat faster, but it was not really bad. The problem came on Tuesday.

The IRS had decided to check all of the company’s accounting books and the whole office turned into complete chaos. People running around looking for documents, her boss yelling at anyone who stopped working for even a second and even the CEO walking amongst them for the first time since she started working there. That day was really stressful for everyone there.

And if that was not enough, a call from her regretful ex-girlfriend got her into an even worst mood. Apparently she was dumped as soon as her new relationship had started and she wanted to get back to her, a thing that bothered her like nothing else in the world. It was one of the only things that made her mad; someone trying to take her for a fool.

When she got to college she saw the little princess Catra in one of the benches. Even their accounting teacher started calling her that, making her realize that she was not the only one who thought about it when he first said it.

The little princess was reading a book but, for some reason, she looked really upset.

During the first week she hadn’t had the chance to talk to her. Usually because she didn’t really have the time, but it was also… complicated. The dark haired girl had a pretty weird aura around her. There was something about her that just made her flinch before she even attempted to get close to her. As if the girl was trying to tell everyone not to approach her with nothing but her presence. She didn’t know if that was her personality or if the girl just had been having an awful couple of weeks, but that last thing was not likely to happen since (even though she had never spoken to her), her classmate who sat in front of her, Kyle (who had an actual chat with her), discovered that she’s the daughter of a pretty successful business man, even if the dark haired girl didn’t want to tell him who said man was or which company he owned. Still, it was incredible for Adora. She remembered how, last Thursday when she got there a bit earlier than normal she saw her getting out of a nice car with a uniformed driver. Clearly not one of those taxis you order through an app, or something like that. She had never used it, but she knew at least that. Especially since, after leaving the girl at the entrance, the car parked close enough and stayed there for a while. She had kept her eyes on it like an idiot until she had to go to class, just to confirm her suspicions.

Knowing all of that made it a little bit harder for her to approach her. “ _Maybe she has security watching over her dressed as common students_ ”, her silly thought even made her giggle a little.

The only thing Adora couldn’t seem to understand was: What was she doing in such a… common college? She had to be honest when saying that the place was not the best one in the estate, let alone in the country so, why did she, with enough money to have a personal driver, took a recommendation to go to such a mediocre college?

She would had her reasons and she wouldn’t judge her, but it was weird.

The day had fortunately not gotten worse for her. It all ended pretty normally, even though she was worried since she had been assigned to do a team project.

She knew that, studying at night school, she wouldn’t be the only one who had to work to pay for tuition so, when one of her professors had put together a few teams to work, her main concern had been the time. Still, she was willing to make it work. And fortunately for her, her team was made with people she had been talking quite regularly since she started college.

On Wednesday, she took the day off that she had earned by working overtime on Saturday when one of her coworkers just didn’t show up without calling. She used the day to take her grandma to the doctor for a regular checkup, just to be sure everything was okay. She had been lucky since they gave her a discount thanks to her grandma’s age. Something new the lady at the front desk said they just started doing that week. And that actually terrified her. Given her life experience, if something good happened, something horrible was about to happen now.

And, as if she were some kind of prophet, it did happen.

She got early to college in order to use the computers in the library (not having one herself) unaware of the trouble ahead.

Before she could get to the entrance, she saw a familiar old red car parked in the street in front of the school. It was, no doubt, her ex-girlfriend’s car. What was she doing there? That was impossible to know, but she knew it was nothing good.

The car door opened from the driver’s side and the girl she wanted to forget got out. She froze in the spot a few meters from the entrance, waiting for her and thinking about what she could want with her now that they were over.

“Hey.” The girl with dreadlocks spoke as if she was ashamed, fidgeting a little in the spot. “I think we should talk.” She spoke again nervously when she got no answer from the blonde. “I know I kind of messed up, but we were together for like three years and I don’t want this to end for just a silly mistake.” They fell silent after that until Adora finally found the strength to answer.

“A little mistake is something like, arriving five minutes later than expected, not finding someone else, because I know you did. It was not a silly mistake and…” Lonnie cut her midsentence and spoke as if she was angry.

“Who told you that lie!?” The brunette raised her voice a little.

“Are you stupid? You posted a freaking photo of you two on Facebook before you unfriended me, dumb ass.” The dreadlock girl covered her face in shame and before she could say anything, the blonde continued. “I’m not going to be your second choice, especially because our relationship wasn’t working anymore. Find someone else, you’re good at it.” She quickly turned towards the college entrance and, without waiting for an answer, started walking.

“Don’t do this!” A hand stopped her, taking her by the arm with enough strength to hurt her a little. “We were together for three years! Did that mean nothing to you?” Adora pulled her arm towards her body, freeing herself from Lonnie’s hand.

She was about to lose her temper and yell at the girl when her classmate, little miss princes, Catra herself, appeared behind the brunette.

“Adora! Sorry for being late.” The smaller girl took her by the arm softly and pulled her a little with a smile she thought it was obviously fake. “I’m sorry, but we have a project to work on.” Catra told Lonnie and pulled her again, walking towards the entrance without saying anything else until they were inside, seating in one of the cafeteria’s tables, where the dark haired girl lost her fake smile and looked at her with a disinterested face. “Sorry if I stepped into something I shouldn’t. I saw her pulling your arm pretty harshly and thought that it was better to apologize now than to feel bad later if something else happened.”

“No, its fine. Thank you, it was getting really awkward back there.” Adora smiled at her with gratitude and Catra smiled too, genuinely this time and for the first time since she had known her, igniting a weird feeling inside her. Or not really weird, but new. Or something like that. It was kind of confusing and she wasn’t sure of anything but one thing: that girl was cute.

* * *

**Catra**

Her week had been passing by without any problems and she was thankful for it. She had gotten used to her new routine now. Even her French lessons didn’t feel as horrible as they had first been. Even though her fingers hurt from playing the guitar as much as she was doing it, it was a welcomed pain too. A pain that made her think about how nice freedom of will felt like.

The weird thing was that, even though everything seemed to be going smoothly, she had a feeling that things would fall apart soon. How and why? She didn’t know, but she knew it. And maybe it was because of her mother almost finding the guitar a couple of days ago when she suddenly decided that knocking was beyond her. She had just finished playing and hid the instrument in its usual place, but the thought of what would have happened if her mother would have entered just a couple of minutes earlier, scared her a little.

What would they do to her if they found out? She knew her father believed in the idea of punishment as an opportunity to grow since that’s how he ultimately became awfully rich and she also knew her mother would not intercede in her behalf. Would Hordak throw her out of the house? Would he ultimately decide to impose his will and make her study what he wanted while keeping a close eye on her? She was not sure, but she knew that, whatever happened, couldn’t be good and, as she had been taught since she was a little kid, she started planning for every possibility that could come around if her parents found out her little secret.

“Hey, Wildcat. Where to? It’s pretty early.” Her driver asked her as soon as she got in the car that morning, a wide smile on the buff woman’s face despite how early it was.

“I have…” She thought about telling her plans to Scorpia, but she didn’t want to get her involved in case things were south. “My father needs me to check a couple things on our accounts in the bank.” Her lie was believable, she thought at first, but not really, if the driver’s hesitance to ask more about the subject and the slight frown on her face was any indication.

And Catra was thankful she didn’t ask. They just drove in silence until they reached the bank and then again once they were driving back to the manor.

Something inside her kept telling her to open up to the woman, but something else told her it was not a good idea, even if she didn’t know why. After all, the driver had been nothing but supportive, but still, she knew that her plan could seem extreme and she didn’t want her to get concerned over something that might not even happen.

Yet, concern never left Scorpia’s face even days after the deed and as such, it was all over her face too. Had she been too obvious? If her driver could discover what her plan was, maybe her father could too and if that happened, it would be the end of it all. No one had to know yet. It was a contingency plan so, if it failed, she would have nothing to protect herself against whatever might come her way.

Finally, she had left her thoughts buried thinking that she needed to enjoy her guitar lessons while they lasted. And so she did. A lot actually. The instrument helped her to feel less anxious and worried too, feeling nothing but happiness every time she played a new chord or attempted to learn a melody through tabs. Sadly, playing guitar actually hurt her fingers and, used to practice for hours, she ended up getting a pretty awful cut on one of them, being advised by her teacher to take it easy for a week.

That day she decided to get to college a little early and use the library. She had no reason, she just didn’t want to be home.

Before the car even parked at the entrance, she saw what looked like an argument between one of her classmates and someone she had never seen before. At first, she thought nothing of it. It wasn’t her problem, after all. Then the girl with dreadlocks pulled the blonde’s arm and she felt concerned that it might turn into a fist fight so, acting by instinct, she decided to intervene.

“Scorpia, stop right here.” She spoke harshly and the car suddenly stopped, the older woman looking at her with concern, but she didn’t stay there to explain. Instead, she got out of the car and almost ran towards the women fighting. Before she got to them, she saw her classmate’s face going red in anger and she could have sworn the taller girl was about to smack the shit out of the brunette.

“Adora! Sorry for being late.” She said loudly while grabbing her arm, trying to stop any attempt of the girl actually hitting the other one in front of them. She turned to look at the dumbfounded girl with dreadlocks and used her best fake smile before she spoke. “I’m sorry, but we have a project to work on.” And without waiting for an answer, she pulled the blonde with her until they were safely inside the cafeteria, where they couldn’t be seen from the outside. Her fake smile lost and replaced by an annoyed frown, her usual mask. “Sorry if I stepped into something I shouldn’t. I saw her pulling your arm pretty harshly and thought that it was better to apologize now than to feel bad later if something else happened.” And when the other girl smiled at her and thanked her, she felt a nice feeling fluttering in her stomach and she couldn’t help but smile. Actually smile this time. It was a genuine ‘thank you’. Not because she had given money to someone or because she had acted the way everyone expected her to act, but because it came from the girl’s heart. Or at least it felt like that.

The moment faded away quickly as another classmate entered the cafeteria and asked the blonde if she could help him to understand something they had learned in a lesson (or apparently not). She stated to walk away thinking about going to the library as she had originally wanted to, but the girl stopped her.

“Do you wanna study with us?” She spoke awkwardly, a small smile on her face.

“I’ve got better things to do.” And those words came out of her as if her brain suddenly had no filter. Why did she say that? Wasn’t this a great opportunity to make actual friends? Why did it feel like her father was speaking through her? Was she so used to acting all high and mighty that she was now incapable of acting like she really wanted to?

The look on the taller girl made her feel even worse. She seemed hurt by her words, and it was understandable yet, her body acted on its own again and without apologizing, she started walking out of the cafeteria, beating herself internally with every step she took.

She was her worst enemy and it was all because of her parents and the way they raised her.

She was the type of girl she had always hated.

In the end, she was just a jerk, and she hated herself because of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I'm back with the new chapter!
> 
> Honestly, one of the things I never imagined when I started thinking about this story was how long it would take me to set up the AU so it could work the way I wanted it. I mean, three chapters and the girls are just now interacting! I didn't really think it would take me that long. 
> 
> Worst part: I'm not even done with this whole "world building". I started thinking about chapter 4 and I realized that I would probably need up to 6 or 7 chapters to get the story to a point where Catra and Adora would be interacting constantly so, the whole "I think this story will be like 10 chapters long" I said at the beginning was bullshit. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you don't get tired of it soon, hahahaha. 
> 
> Also: I deactivated my twitter account as @Gloomy_autumn since my friends and colleagues found out about it and I thought: "Well, what the hell? Let's use my real account." So, if you want to follow me, you can search @Chichothegod on Twitter and Instagram, I'll be re-uploading all my awful drawings in the following days.


	4. Breaking Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Catra's secret is out  
> Adora has a tough day at work

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter while listening to "Voyager" and the title comes from their song "Breaking Down".

# Chapter 4 – Breaking Down

**Catra**

That morning started like any other. Birds chirping, gentle breeze moving the leaves of the trees, the sun rising with no clouds shading its imposing figure in the sky. Yes, any idiot would say that was a beautiful day. Thankfully, Catra was no idiot. Or maybe, not thankfully. Idiots were always happier, after all.

After what happened on Wednesday, she hadn’t been able to sleep well. She felt so stupid and hated herself so much. It was hard to believe how much her parents had messed her up.

Looking at her blonde classmate had become impossible. Memories of her stupidity flooded her mind and filled her with anxiety. She felt so powerless now that she realized how much she hated herself. Thankfully for her, the other girl had been absent from college since then.

It was laughable too; her confidence and self-esteem had fallen down in just a moment. Not in a day or an hour, but in just a minute and with just a little comment.

Every time she looked at the mirror, she saw her parents and her stomach turned in disgust, not wanting to believe what she thought.

Every time she had to speak she heard her parents and her anger grew immeasurably, always directed at herself.

She didn’t feel safe even in her mind. Never ending thoughts of how’s and why’s overwhelming her in the worst way imaginable.

That particular morning, she had only been able to sleep a couple of hours and when her alarm rang, she stood up feeling her body sore and heavy. The thought of skipping her French lessons passed through her mind, but if she did so, she would have no excuse to go to her guitar lessons and lately, they were the only thing that still made her feel happiness, giving her strength to get out of bed. So she stood up and took a quick shower before going down for breakfast.

Once finished, she went to the dining room, finding the table already filled with food and unpleasant company. His parents sitting as far as they could from each other and her dad’s mistress right beside him. She wasn’t a hundred percent sure that the purple haired girl named Entrapta was actually her father’s mistress, but damn did they act like that sometimes, and that disgusted her. At least her mother had the decency of hiding her affairs.

“Catra.” Her father, about to put some fruit in his mouth, stopped when he saw her, anger suddenly contorting his face. “We need to talk.” A shiver ran down her spine as nervousness filled her head, cold sweat quickly appearing on her already cold hands.

“What is it?” She played it cool as her parents had always taught her, making her feel even sicker.

“My accountant contacted me yesterday. He said there was a large amount of money taken from your account in the previous weeks. I could trace some of that money and I found out you’re not only taking French lessons, but also guitar lessons. I couldn’t trace the rest of the money, so I assume you bought a pretty expensive guitar with cash. Care to explain?” She felt her soul leave her body as she heard her father talking, anger escaping with each word he said.

She looked at him with the best poker face she could put on as a mask and saw how the purple haired girl patted his hand a little without stopping whatever she was doing with the laptop in front of her. She then looked at her mother who quickly sighed as if she was tired and got up, leaving the room.

Taking a deep breath, she thought about her answer. Her heart pumped so fast she felt like she was about to have a heart attack.

“I knew you would not allow it. I had to hide it from you.” She spoke, her voice wavering a little as she felt cold sweat now running down her back.

“Is that why you attend college at night like a misfit?” His tone was louder now, angrier too.

“No…” She answered quickly, fully panicking now. “I really wanted to learn French.” She tried to compose herself, but his father’s face, completely engulfed in anger, was the scariest thing she had seen. Never in her life had she seen him as angry as he was now.

“Don’t you dare lie to me, Catra!” He suddenly stood up as he yelled, his chair falling off with a loud sound that echoed through the room and startled her even more. “I gave you a little freedom and you betray my trust like this!? I want you out of those lessons today! I will find and destroy that guitar myself if that’s what it takes! You hear me!?” She felt herself trembling in both fear and anger as his father stopped to breathe before he continued scolding her, not yelling now. “And I want you out of that night shit school you’re into. You will do as I say again or you will find yourself living under a bridge within a week to mold your character. Understood?” Her vision went blurry suddenly as tears started to fall on her cheeks. A nod was all she could give her father before she ran off towards the entrance, getting into Scorpia’s car as soon as she could, sitting while hugging her legs, hiding her face in them.

“Hey! You finished breakfast early today. Ready for some…?” The woman finally looked at her through the rear mirror and stopped when she saw her, her smile turning into a sad and concerned look. “French…” She spoke in a whisper and, without saying anything else, Scorpia started the car and began driving.

Catra didn’t know where the woman was taking her, but she didn’t complain. Any place would be better than her house right now.

She obviously had expected his father to find out about what she was doing eventually, but she never imagined it would be this soon. She thought she would have at least a year to maybe get a better contingency plan, but luck was not on her side, as usual. And it was all her fault. That “back-up” plan she had thought about was the reason he found out. How could she not think of that? The lessons were cheap enough for his accountant to pass them as a regular expense. The guitar was also cheap enough for him to believe she had bought a new jacket or something like that. Yet, she was so dumb that she had made a huge mistake in the last part of her plan.

Or maybe, this mistake could be turned into something good. Maybe it was time for her to start living her life. After all, his father didn’t know the whole story.

She could get a good job, find a place and never see her family again. She could save money little by little to buy another guitar, maybe even to pay for tuition and study what she really wanted to.

The question was: was she strong enough to accomplish all that by herself? Just that morning she couldn’t even get out of bed and when she did it she felt so bad she wanted to just go back under the covers and stay there all day. Could she sustain herself like that? Alone, with a boring job, feeling like shit every day.

Yes, there was a lot she could gain from that, but she could lose a lot too. Maybe her father was right and she would end up living under a bridge. But, was it really worse than her current situation?

Living under a tyrant’s rules, not being able to be herself or living freely as a vagabond. Honestly, both options were bad, but the bridge one felt more appealing to her now.

The car suddenly stopped and she raised her head to see where Scorpia had taken her, her tears stopping as she whipped off her wet face with the sleeve of her jacket. They were in a parking lot, one she didn’t know. She looked at the rear mirror and saw the buff woman looking at her with a worried frown. That worried frown she had seen before. The only one that was real. Her friend’s worry. Her only real friend, all thanks to her parents.

Tears fell down again and she lowered her head, hiding it in her legs just like before. And for a long time, all she could hear was her own cries on the car in the silence of the parking lot.

* * *

**Adora**

She was having a really awful day today. Her grandma got sick two days before that morning and she took her to the hospital. The doctors assured her that she would be okay but she needed to stay there a couple of days and so, she called the company to let them know why she would be missing work for those days. She even missed school until she knew her grandma would be okay.

Finally, today she could take her grandma home, leaving her reluctantly to go to work, where her jerk of a boss, Octavia, almost fired her despite the situation. _“ **When you take sick days is because you’re sick, not someone else!”**_ She had yelled while they were in her office, making her blood boil in anger.

“Hey, blondie, your ‘best friend’ from HR told me she wants you there as soon as possible. She was pretty mad.” Her only friend in that department, Huntara, told her with a worried look. “Sorry about your grandma, by the way. And don’t listen to that jerk. Once you explain everything to HR she won’t be able to fire you. And if you need something, you just have to ask, okay?” The huge woman smiled and gave her a thumbs up.

“Thank you, really.” She stood up from the chair she was sitting in and walked to the woman, putting a hand on her shoulder. “Right now I just need to keep this job, so I will go talk to my ‘friend’ there.” They shared a giggle and she then walked towards the elevator in order to get to the floor she had to be in.

She was soon in front of a door with a sign that said “Human Resources”, taking a deep breath before knocking on it. Quickly after her quiet knock, the door opened and a very angry looking pink haired girl looked at her.

“In, now!” The girl spoke with authority and she did as she was told. Once she was inside, the door shut loudly, startling her. “Sit!” The girl signaled a chair in front of one of the desks and she quickly did as instructed waiting until the shorter girl sat at the chair in front of her before saying anything.

“Glimmer, I…” She was interrupted before she could finish by a hush from the girl.

“I already know what happened. Octavia sent me an email about it. Several, actually. I don’t want any excuses. Tell me the truth…” She took a deep breath again, waiting for the question that she knew was about to come. “Why didn’t you tell me about it first? We’re friends, Adora. I could have done something for you. And I don’t mean here at the office, but like… I don’t know… I could have helped you with whatever you needed.” The blonde let out the breath she had been holding in, relieved to see the pink haired girl was not actually mad at her. “You didn’t even tell Bow. Why?”

“Glimmer, you know I don’t like to bother you with my responsibilities…” She was interrupted again by the shorter girl.

“Wrong. You’re incapable of asking for help. We’ve known each other for a long time, I know that much. Still, I will never get tired of telling you that I will be there when you need me. Me and Bow.” The girl smiled at her and she felt a nice feeling of relief in her chest.

“Yeah, I know. It’s just that… well, things happened so fast and then all I had to do was wait and now is over so…” She couldn’t help but feel bad. After all, they wanted to help her and honestly, they would have been a great help.

“’Is over’ my ass! Even if all you had to do was wait, you know we would have been there to wait with you. Emotional support is not a joke, girl. We love you and we’re both kind of mad that you didn’t contact us at all.” The girl looked at her with a frown again. She scratched her nape, ashamed. Something felt kind of odd since she was being scolded for a really weird reason, but at the same time, it felt good. 

“I know, I know… I swear I will be more open from now on.” The pink haired girl changed her frown for a smile and she smiled too. 

“Great. Repeat after me: I can’t handle everything alone and that’s fine.” Her friend closed her eyes and put a hand up, as if she was swearing an oath. 

“What?” She said between giggles.

“Say it!” Glimmer said, faking anger in her voice.

“Okay… I can’t handle everything alone and that’s fine…” Imitating the shorter girl’s pose, she spoke trying to sound like her too. Making both of them giggle. 

“Good.” There was a little silence before the HR girl spoke again. “You know, my dad and I can make sure Octavia doesn’t try to fire you, but I think she would change the way she treats you if she knows you’re friends with the HR department. I mean, I’m just an intern, but my dad is the head of the department.” She spoke with concern again and the worry returned to the blonde’s face.

“I know, but I wouldn’t like people to think that I’m here just because I have connections. I would rather have them all think we hate each other.” The pink haired girl nodded and leaned back on her chair.

“I get it, but I can’t help but worry about you. You just broke up with your girlfriend a few days ago, your grandma is sick, you’re going to college. I don’t want you to suddenly collapse in the street from all the stress.” The blonde faked a chuckle and looked at her worried friend with an, also fake, smile.

“I’m tougher than I look. Don’t worry.” Her friend sighed in resignation and then leaned to the desk in front of her.

“You should at least consider taking the scholarship program the company has. I’ve told you before: No one would think the company is giving you a scholarship because you have connections. There are a couple of girls who’re in the program and I don’t even know their names!” Glimmer said the last part dramatically, making her giggle again.

“I know… I think I will actually apply. I could save some money and that sounds great.” The girl in front of her smiled proudly at her.

“Great! Let’s fill out the form right now!” And so they did.

With every word they wrote, Adora felt a little bit of weight being lifted from her and she couldn’t help but think about how stupid she was for not accepting that help before and many other times.

Glimmer was right; she should accept help more often.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, I'm finally back with the new chapter!
> 
> I really love writing conflict and I think you can see it by now. Besides, who hasn't had a jerky boss just like Octavia? They're the worst. 
> 
> What's going to happen now? Well, there's just one more chapter to stablish some details and then we will dive right into this Catradora thing we're all waiting for (yeah, I was waaaaaay off when I said this story would be like 10 chapters long, I'm starting to think this story will be even longer than my previous one. Thoughts to words translate in a very weird way).
> 
> Anyway, I hope you're enjoying it so far and don't forget to follow me on Twitter: @ChichoTheGod (I know, humble, right?) I'm still uploading my drawings as I improve. 
> 
> See you next week!


	5. On Fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Catra has a decision to make.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was written while I listened to Anvil and the title comes from their song "On Fire".

# Chapter 5 – On Fire

**Catra**

After a long while of crying, she was finally able to stop, but she didn’t feel like raising her head and speak to her driver yet.

Scorpia would never judge her for crying, she knew that much. But still, at the top of her head, the same words kept going on repeat: “ **you will never cry in front of people. They will think you’re weak and stupid. I don’t want them to think I raised an idiot.”** A deep voice she knew and hated kept telling her even when she tried to think about something else.

For at least a couple of times, she had heard a few beeping sounds coming from the front seat; the driver’s watch that made a beep every hour. With each beep she heard, her heart sunk a little bit more. It was almost time for her guitar lessons; the lessons she would never be able to attend again.

Finally, after another hour, she raised her head and looked through the window, seeing the same parking lot she had seen hours ago. Then she turned her eyes towards the rear mirror, scared of what she would see or what the only person she considered a friend would say to her. The pair of eyes she met where full of worry, even though she had tried to mask that with a tiny smile on her lips.

“Hey… are you feeling better?” The buff woman asked her, breaking the silence after what felt like forever.

“Yes. Thank you…” Her answer came out in almost a whisper and raspy due to the knot that had been in her throat not too long ago.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Her vision went to her legs again as she thought about it. Would it be good to tell her what happened? Maybe. Would it be bad? Probably not. Scorpia was all ‘love’ and ‘empathy’, but she was not used to talking about her problems and feelings so, even if she knew the older woman wouldn’t judge her, it was difficult for her. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to. Come on…” The white haired woman opened the driver’s door. “Let’s get some tea to calm you down.” And in a swift movement, she got out of the car, leaving her confused as she remembered she didn’t even know where they were. Were they going to get tea at a parking lot?

“Scorpia, where are we?” She spoke after getting out of the car, following the taller woman as she walked towards the elevators.

“Oh, yeah. You’ve never come here, right? We’re at my place.” They quickly got to the elevators and the driver pressed the button for one of them to open. “I mean, not like this is my building or anything but, you know what I mean.” She couldn’t help but giggle a little at the woman’s rambling. It was always funny to her; the way her friend usually talks before she thinks about what she was going to say. “So, you don’t have to worry about that tea. I assure you its top quality. My girlfriend has the best tea in the world.” One of the elevators opened and they went in, going up the floors while Scorpia kept telling her about her girlfriend and how great she was.

Her rambling only stopped once they were finally inside the apartment, where Catra sat at one of the couches, the smaller one, while she waited for her friend to come back with the tea.

The whole place was smaller than what she was used to, but it felt very comfy. It actually looked like a place where people lived and not a place just arranged to take a picture. Everything was clean and in order, except for a couple misplaced objects, like a blanket half folded in the largest couch or a couple of books messily piled at the coffee table. The space felt warm, unlike the coldness from her house. It was more comfortable too, even if it was a lot smaller.

Drifting off from those thoughts, she remembered the situation she was in and was still thinking if it would be fine to tell the older woman about it. A part of her really wanted to, but another part said that she shouldn’t because no one really cared about her problems and people would just laugh at her for telling them. She knew that last thought was the way her father thought and not what she believed, but it was so difficult to silence that little voice that kept constricting her positive thoughts and she felt like crying again, even if she didn’t want to.

“Hey, I hope you like this one. I don’t even remember how to pronounce the name, but it’s my favorite.” She didn’t notice when the buff woman sat beside her in the largest couch after leaving a couple of cups on the coffee table and was startled a little by her voice.

“It’s okay.” Grabbing the cup quickly, she took a sip, burning her lips a little while the liquid went down her throat. It was a nice, strong flavor she knew already. “Chamomile.”

“Yeah, that’s it! You’re really smart, wildcat.” Her chest filled with a different type of warmth when she heard her friend and she felt like maybe it would be okay to talk to her about her problem, and so she did.

“Scorpia…” A moment of hesitation stopped her, the claws of her father shredding her newfound courage.

“It’s fine if you don’t want to talk about it. You just need to know I’ll be here if you want and I’ll help you in whatever you need if I can.” A tiny smile formed on her lips as she felt her burden lighten a little.

“I do want to tell you, it’s just… difficult.” The woman put a hand on her shoulder in support as she looked at her with a smile, as if she could understand her.

“Don’t worry. Take your time. I’m not going anywhere.” And so, a long silence engulfed the room after her words. She could have never imagined that opening up to someone would be such a difficult task, but it was proving to be almost impossible.

The seconds turned to minutes. Her mouth opened and closed again as if she were a fish. The knot she felt in her throat and the burning sensation in her stomach grew as time passed.

“This morning…” And she finally spoke, anxiety stiffening her muscles and cold sweat covering her palms. Her friend looked at her, supporting her, making her know she was paying attention to her and her alone. “My dad found out I was taking guitar lessons. He told me to quit and I’m pretty sure he will have the staff look for my guitar all over the house in order to burn it or something.” Her eyes started to fill with water as she clenched her fists in anger and desperation, trying not to cry again. 

“Catra…” Worry and sadness appeared suddenly in the driver’s face, genuinely. “I’m really sorry that happened. But how? You were so careful not to get caught.” 

“I messed up, Scorpia. I’m an idiot!” Her voice wavered as tears ran down her cheeks. Her hands quickly went to her face to cover it. “I planned for everything except for my own stupidity!” Her whimpers filled the room quickly, as she was unable to hold them back. A pair of strong arms suddenly hugged her, not saying anything, just holding her while she tried to control herself again.

“You’re not an idiot. You might have made a mistake, but we all make mistakes. It’s okay to make them.” One of the strong hands started patting her head softly, bringing her a little bit more comfort. “So please, don’t say you’re stupid, ‘cause you’re not.” And even if she felt comfort at the woman’s hug and words, her weeping didn’t stop. On the contrary, it seemed to be getting worse.

Those words were, and she knew it well, what she had always wanted to hear from her parents. Understanding, acceptance, love. She didn’t want any more than that and getting it touched a sensitive fiber in her, even if it didn’t come from the people she wanted. In the end, the words came from her only friend so, it was just as good.

Again, she felt like a lot of time passed until she could calm herself and she tried to speak again, still sobbing. Her head also hurt like hell for a reason that escaped her. She had never cried that much in a day. Not even as a kid.

“I stole ten thousand dollars from my dad, that’s how he found out.” Her voice broke as she spoke and the warmth of Scorpia’s body left her suddenly while the woman, still kneeled on the floor, looked at her with fear and worry in her eyes.

“The day we went to the bank…” The buff woman spoke in a whisper and she nodded slightly.

“I knew he would find out eventually, so I planned about what I would do in case he didn’t like the idea…” With the sleeve of her jacket, she dried her face as best as she could.

“What was your plan exactly?” Her friend returned to the couch she had been seating before and she took her slightly cold tea, drinking a little.

“I was going to get enough money for me to get out of the house and never go back. I thought I would have at least a year to get it.” She drank again, not wanting the beverage to go to waste or get completely cold.

“I see…” There was a brief silence again, only filled by noises that came from the streets.

“He would normally not notice that amount of money missing, but I didn’t think about the situation. Of course he would be monitoring every movement I made after I went against his wishes.” Her tone was filled with anger, mostly directed at herself for a reason that escaped her.

“And what did he tell you?” Contrary to hers, her friend’s tone was filled with worry. 

“Well, you can guess already. If I don’t start doing as he wants again, I will be out of the house soon. I think he’s more upset about this because he thinks those ten thousand were spent in a really expensive guitar.” A sarcastic chuckle escaped her mouth without her thinking about it.

“So, he doesn’t know where the money is?” She took a deep breath again as she felt her body going back to normal completely.

“No. I took them out in cash and then opened a new account with them, under my name now, not as a secondary account. I don’t think he will ever find out about that account due to the bank’s privacy policy, you know, since I’m an adult now, but that’s still useless.” The older woman took her hand and got closer to her, a look of worry still in her face.

“Catra, I’m going to tell you something crazy, but I want you to consider it, okay?” She nodded hesitantly. Was the only person she considered a real friend about to ask her for money in exchange for everything she had done for her? No, Scorpia wasn’t like that.

“What is it?” Her trust issues engulfed her completely, making her ready to run out of the place if the buff woman dared to betray the trust she had had on her. At the same time, a little voice in her head reminded her of how impossible that was.

“I’ve been living in this apartment for years. When I first moved in, my girlfriend was just my roommate, we had our own room each. We fell in love and stopped using one of the rooms. We’ve been thinking about using that room for different things over the years, but we’ve never done anything to it so, it’s just there, getting dustier and dustier every day…” The woman paused for a second and took a breath while Catra looked at her with confusion, not knowing where she was going with that story. “If you really want to get out of that house, I want you to know that the empty room can be your room. You have enough money to sustain yourself until you find a job and I can help you in whatever you need. I’m sure my girlfriend would too. You could drop out of that college and those French lessons I know you hate. My girlfriend has a lot of friends so, I’m pretty confident she can find you a nice job you like so that you can buy a new guitar and pay for your lessons. How does that sound?”

And from all the things she could have expected her to say, that was not among them. It was honestly a pretty good suggestion, but she also felt overwhelmed and confused. She couldn’t just take a decision right there. She was used to think about all things that could go wrong and she felt the need to do the same in this situation. At the same time, she didn’t want to turn down the offer. Was there a time limit within it?

“Scorpia, I…” Before she could say anything, the white haired woman stopped her.

“You don’t have to answer me right now. I know you like to think things through so, why don’t you think about it and, once you have an answer, you can tell me? I also need to talk with my girlfriend about it, but I know she would be thrilled to have you here. I talk about you so much I think she already considers you a close friend.” The woman giggled awkwardly and so did she.

“You don’t have to…” She said, still smiling and feeling a nice warmth in her chest.

“I know, but I want to.” And without a warning, the buff woman was hugging her again, making her feel lighter with just that little action.

She really needed to think about that offer. It was too good to be true so, she knew there might be some trouble hiding in there. That’s why she decided to go to college that day only to use the library, a quiet space where no one would bother her, to think about that thoroughly. It was better than going back home.

Still, without really having thought about it, she was almost certain she would end up taking the offer. It sounded a lot better than living with her parents and also better than being a vagabond in the streets, the only options she thought she had before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I'm finally back with an update! 
> 
> This chapter was completely focused on Catra's situation 'cause it was longer than I expected (if I had included Adora's as I've been doing in previous chapters, I would have ended up with a really long one, so I had to cut it here). Next chapter will be the opposite; Adora's struggles. 
> 
> I really hope you're enjoying the story even if the Catradora part of it is taking so long (I love to set up things and I think I went too far with that in this story). I assure you, we'll get there and it will be beautiful... okay, that last part I can't assure you, but I'll do my best. 
> 
> Anyway, thank you for reading and, if you want, you can follow me on Twitter @ChichoTheGod (the humble guy haha), I'm currently drawing for Inktober and Owltober (an Inktober from The Owl House kind of thing) and I'm not really good, but I'm trying so, if you find it in your heart to give me a chance, you can follow me and criticize my work to help me get better.


	6. The Origins of Ruin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adora is struggling with life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter while listening to "Redemption" and the title comes from their song "The Origins of Ruin".

# Chapter 6 – The Origins of Ruin

**Adora**

After her talk with Glimmer, she returned to her desk to find a lot of work piling up on it, as if no one had touched her desk in the last few days and, even though she wasn’t there, they kept giving her more and more work. No. Not “as if”. She was sure that was what happened and she was sure it was because of her boss’ orders.

It took her almost the entire day to get rid of just the urgent and most important things she had to do. After a missing lunch break and a couple hours of overtime, she finally got the pile down to work that could wait until the next day.

Her shoulders stiff and her head and stomach aching from hunger, she decided to go to college at least to explain why she had been absent and why she would probably be late for a couple more days.

Taking her lessons at night was the right choice. She only had one or two lessons a day and it would be easier to catch up. Maybe she would have a lot of homework and she would have to make up for the project she couldn’t submit in time, but she was sure none of her professors were jerks like her boss and they would understand her situation.

When she got to college, the first thing she did was buy something to eat from the cafeteria that had almost nothing given the hour. A bag of chips, a soda and a cigarette would have to do it. After all, she got there in the middle of a lesson so, in order to not interrupt it, she would have to wait like twenty minutes, enough time to regain energy with her “gourmet” meal. 

After devouring the chips and drinking the soda so fast it hurt her stomach, she made a quick call home to see how her grandma was holding up. Once she assured her everything was okay, she hung up and took out a much needed cigarette to calm the nerves and stress she had went through the day.

As nicotine traveled through her system and the fresh autumn wind hit her, she questioned herself if one day she would be able to have a better life. A fulfilling job, time to find a hobby, get a nice girlfriend, maybe marry and have kids without a worry in the world. Every time she thought about it, it felt so impossible. Utopic, almost.

What if she graduated and couldn’t find a good job? What if she could find a good job but it was so time consuming she wouldn’t be able to do anything else? What if she died alone? Why was she such a pessimist?

Before she realized it, the cigarette butt was all that was left, so she found the closest ashtray to throw it away, looking at her watch to see she still had five minutes before the lesson ended.

From the corner of her eye she saw a figure she recognized walking out of a building; Catra.

The last time they spoke was not the best. The rich girl had been nice to her and then she turned her down in a very rude way, but she couldn’t stop thinking if maybe she had done that because she felt uncomfortable around people.

Not once since they started college had she seen the dark haired girl talking to more than one person at a time so, maybe she felt pressured when the possibility of talking to two came into play. And if that was the case, maybe she should go over to her and apologize for putting her on that spot. Even if she was wrong, an apology wouldn’t hurt her, so she walked towards the girl, calling her name before she was there, making the other girl look at her in confusion as she stopped walking.

“Hey, Catra. It’s been a while, huh?” Great, Adora. Smooth. How could she not think of something better?

“Sure…” The other girl answered with hesitation and, once close to her, she noticed how the girl’s eyes were red and puffy as if she had been crying which made her feel a little worried.

“Are you okay?” She asked without thinking, moving her right hand to meet Catra’s face, only to be slapped by said girl in a quick movement.

“I’m fine. What do you want?” The girl spoke in an angry tone, taking a step back from her.

“Sorry.” She apologized quickly, knowing that maybe she had stepped on the rich girl’s boundaries again. “I just wanted to apologize and thank you again for what happened the other day.”

“It’s fine.” The shorter girl started to walk away just like that, still sounding annoyed in her answer. Something about that got on her nerves. It was rude. She was rude.

“Hey, come on, I just…” She put her hand on the girl’s shoulder, making her jump and look back at her, interrupting her before she could finish.

“I said its fine, Adora. Let it go.” The dark haired girl raised her tone a little, something that made her blood boil for a second time that day.

The bell ran suddenly as they both looked at each other. Catra’s face had an angry frown that made her even madder. All she wanted was to apologize and she was being treated as a nuisance? Hell no!

“You know, I came here to apologize for something I didn’t even know if I did wrong, but I can see now…” With each word, her voice got louder as the voices of other students started to fill the hallways, her face contorting in anger. “I did nothing wrong!” She finally yelled at the top of her lungs, not even thinking about where they were. At her yelling, the shorter girl in front of her changed her face from anger to fear, as if something had awoken inside her, and she took a step back again. “So, why do you have to be such a jerk!?” She yelled again and saw the girl shrinking a little more in her place.

The whole place was suddenly engulfed in silence. She turned her head to see that everyone was watching them and it was then that she realized how bad she had messed up. She let her stress get the better of her and she had become the real jerk. She was such an idiot.

“You know, I might be a jerk.” The rich girl took a step forward, getting closer to her and now it was her the one taking a step back. “But I’m not the one yelling at someone else because they don’t act the way you want them to.” She could see tears starting to form in Catra’s eyes before the girl turned around and walked quickly out of the school, leaving her there, frozen for at least a minute.

Catra’s back seemed smaller with each step she took and she just couldn’t bring herself to go and apologize again. The only thing she could do once she snapped out of her initial shock was to take her backpack and go to her lesson, feeling everyone’s gaze on her as she walked through the hallways, making her feel like a horrible person. Or maybe she just felt like that because of how she acted, independently of what anyone could think.

Burying her thoughts, she went through her lesson just like usual after talking briefly to the professor. Yet, she couldn’t silence the little voice that kept telling her how much of a jerk she was.

When she finally got home, she saw her grandma sleeping, sitting in the couch, with the old TV on in some old movie. Exhausted, she sat beside her grandma, letting her backpack on the floor and sighing loudly. She closed her eyes for a moment as she breathed deeply, her mind going through the events of the day. 

“Tough day?” Her grandma’s voice startled her a little as she turned to see her, sighing again.

“No. It was a beautiful day.” She said sarcastically, making her grandma giggle.

“You wanna talk about it, dear?” The old woman took the controller and turned off the TV, completely willing to listen to her.

“I messed up, like always.” Her grandma hugged her as she continued. “And I don’t even know why I did it.”

“Maybe if you tell me, you will see your mistake. Sometimes, that’s all it takes.” She felt a couple of pats on her back, encouraging her.

“Well, there’s this rich girl at college… I invited her to study with me and someone else and she turned me down so I apologized because… I don’t even know why. I’m sure I did nothing wrong, but I did it because I thought it was the right thing to do.” She paused for a second and took a deep breath as her grandma hummed, telling her to go on. “And when I apologized, she treated me like… as if I was a burden or something. It made me so mad. I ended up yelling at her in front of everyone.”

“That is weird. You never get mad. Did something happen at work?” A shiver ran through her body as her grandma finished speaking. She didn’t want to tell her how she had had to work thrice as hard as usual due to the days she was sick. She didn’t want to make her feel responsible for that.

“The usual. A lot of work. I could barely eat and I had to stay a little bit longer.” She lied as best as she could.

“Well, you’re going through a lot of stress lately, with work, school and then your old grandma being a pain in the ass with her health.” She was about to say something when her grandma shushed her. “Don’t even try. I know taking care of an old lady is hard. I’ve done it too when I was young. I also know that you completely missed two days of work and it’s impossible for it to be ‘the usual’. You probably had endless piles of work to do. And I know how much of a jerk your boss is. It’s only natural that you snapped at someone. You can’t be nice all the time when you’re going through so much at once.” 

“I know, but that shouldn’t be an excuse for how I acted. I didn’t even think about it. It just… came out of me.” Her grandma patted her head and got her closer to her.

“It isn’t an excuse, it’s just the cause. You’re just a person, Adora. We can only do so much. We make mistakes, we fix them and learn. But we can’t stop when we fall, remember that.” She sighed at her grandma’s words that, even if they were true, they didn’t make her feel better.

“What should I do now? I feel awful for yelling at her. I mean, I could see she had been crying. She’s obviously going through something too and I… I’m an idiot.” Her grandma tightened the hug and giggled a little again.

“At these times you’re just like Mara. You both feel like the world is crumbling at the first sight of trouble and then you push yourselves too hard to solve it, only to find that it is actually not that hard, you know why?” She shook her head and hummed as an answer. “Because you’re strong. And smart.”

“I don’t know about that…” She said in a whisper, feeling tears starting to fill her eyes. 

“Yes, you do. Just look at what you’re doing right now. Sure, you made a little mistake while you try to make a better future for yourself, but you go to work, then to college, then come back home to take care of an old lady. How many people can do that much at the same time? I’m gonna tell you: not many. Add to that, your girlfriend dumped you a few weeks ago and you didn’t shed a single tear. Remember that little fairytale I used to read you?” She nodded, a smile on her lips and the tears still burning in her eyes, begging to go out. “Well, right now, you’re stronger than She-ra. You’re the strongest woman in the universe! So, don’t go saying you can’t do something or you don’t know how to do something, because we both know you’re completely capable of achieving everything you want. No grandma likes to hear anyone talking shit about their children. Especially when it comes from said child.” Now she giggled as a couple of tears got out, running down her face.

The room fell silent for a minute, both of them just enjoying each other’s presence in that cozy old couch. Only the sound of passing cars and trees moving their leaves filled the room.

“What do you think I should do?” She finally broke the silence, unable to stop thinking about her dilemma.

“What do you think you should do?” She thought about it for another second before answering.

“Apologize? But I don’t know if she would want to see me ever again.” Another sigh got out of her mouth, feeling like the thousandth that day. “And I wouldn’t blame her.”

“Then it’s her lost. You don’t owe her any more than that. You just want to do the right thing, if she doesn’t accept it well, how sad, but there’s nothing more to do.” Her grandma moved to get up from the couch, taking her cane.

“I guess you’re right.” She stood up too, helping her grandma stay in her feet.

“No, you were right. I was just telling you why.” Once her grandma stood up too, she started walking towards the kitchen. “Now, it seems to me like you could use some tasty food to feel better.”

“Its fine, you don’t have to cook. I know you must not be feeling very well. Let me do it.” She walked behind her grandma, looking carefully to see if there was anything in the floor that could make her trip.

“Nonsense. A grandma always has the strength to feed her children. Besides, I can’t let you cook. This food has to be edible.” They both chuckled as they got to the kitchen, where she sat at the small bar watching her grandma getting started to cook.

Maybe she was right; maybe she was worrying too much about a very simple thing. Apparently, she did that a lot, if her earlier chat with Glimmer was any indication.

Accept help, don’t worry too much. That should become her new mantra because, whatever the hell she had been doing up to now, it was clearly not working. It wouldn’t hurt her to try something new.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I'm finally back with the new chapter. I apologize for the delay, but I'm currently preparing to move out of my house and it's been chaotic as hell. You think you don't have a lot of stuff until you're moving out.
> 
> But whatever. This chapter was completely focused on Adora's struggles, as I said last week. Next chapter, we will go back to the half-half dynamic I started with. 
> 
> I think you're realizing now that this is not really a college AU kind of thing (I love those but I love the "harsh life drama" even more) but I hope you're enjoying it nonetheless. 
> 
> I'll try to post the next chapter within a week, but it might take me a couple more days just like this one so, I'll apologize in advance just in case. 
> 
> Thank you for reading!


	7. Let's Hear It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Catra starts a new life.  
> Adora apologizes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter while listening to "Chrome Division" and the title comes from their song, "Let's hear it".

# Chapter 7 – Let’s Hear It

**Catra**

“Catra.” Her father called her as she entered the house. He was sitting in the smallest fancy couch on the living room right at an angle where he could see the door. She walked towards him slightly afraid and, at the same time, with conviction. “You didn’t come home last night. I was worried.” He said in a monotonous tone as his look went back to the tablet he had on his hand. Sure, he had been so worried he never even thought about texting or calling her.

“I stayed at a friend’s place.” She answered, a little bit of anger in her voice.

“Sit.” He signaled the couch in front of the one he was sitting in and she sat down. “We both know you don’t have friends.” He took a cup of coffee from the table in the middle and sipped from it, as if the thing he just said was the most normal thing you say to your daughter every day and it couldn’t hurt her. “But I’m willing to let it slide if you tell me you’re going to start doing as I say again. A couple weeks of… ‘Rebellion’ should have been enough for you to see how awful the world can be without my money. I’ve seen pictures of that college and it is... horrible.”

As she heard every word that came out of her father’s mouth, her blood boiled more and more. He was such an asshole. A megalomaniac who though he was always right and only he could be the bringer of truth. She couldn’t wait now to tell her what she was going to do. And so, with a smug smile on her face, she started telling him.

“Yes, I’ve think things through and I know what’s best for me.” His father took another sip of his coffee as he nodded, as if he already knew what she was going to say. “I’m dropping out of that college and those lessons.” He let out a small chuckle and she was a hundred percent sure that he was internally patting himself for being so smart and able to see into the future like the god he thought he was. “I’m also leaving this house. I’ll go and live with Scorpia and her girlfriend. They’re more than happy to take me in.” She enjoyed not only saying that, but seeing how Hordak’s face contorted in anger as she kept going.

“You!” He threw his cup to the floor, yelling with anger.

The sound of the cup breaking on the floor and the loud yell startled her and she prepared herself mentally to listen to his father yelling at her again for hours and hours as she shrank in the couch more and more, as usual, but nothing else came.

Uncharacteristically, her father sat at the couch again, with a hand massaging his eyes and breathing deeply, not saying a word. She wasn’t sure if that scared her more than the yelling. And that silence lasted for almost a minute, making her more uncomfortable with each second that passed. She decided to say something, but before she did, the man spoke again.

“Maybe this is what you really needed. A little bit of independence to see how harsh the world is.” His tone was the calmest tone she had ever heard coming from him and she couldn’t help but feel a little confused. “I assume you know I won’t be giving you any money if you do this. You would have to find a job and support yourself. Are you aware?” He looked at her, a frown still on his face but his tone remaining calm.

“Yes. Scorpia’s girlfriend is pretty confident she can find me a good job.” Hordak nodded and hummed as an answer. After that, another silence engulfed the room for a while until the man spoke.

“Are you aware of the fact that, without you here, I have no use for Scorpia’s services? She would need to find a job too. Your decision might be making things harder for her and her girlfriend. Have you thought about that?” She felt a little scared hearing how calm his father was, but she had gone through every little thing that could go wrong yesterday and she was confident on what she was about to do.

“Yes. We talked about that yesterday. She said that won’t be a problem.” At her answer, the man sighed and massaged his temples with one hand before he spoke again.

“You know, I found your guitar yesterday.” A shiver ran through her spine as she heard that. “It was an awful piece of wood. It couldn’t have costed you more than a hundred bucks.” She felt suddenly very nervous as her father kept talking. “If I take that into consideration, it would have been impossible for you to spend so much money on that and the lessons. I take it you still have the money because you were planning this.” He didn’t ask, but it sounded as if he wanted a confirmation for his statement and she didn’t know what to answer. That money was her new and only contingency plan for this new thing she was about to do. It was basically the whole reason she thought it was possible. Was he going to ask her to give it back? But she couldn’t hide it. She didn’t think he would find out about it and so, she never thought about an excuse.

“I have it in a different account I opened for myself.” She said as her palms started to get sweaty and cold. His father just nodded.

“Well…” She tried to mentally prepare herself for the worst as he started speaking. “Keep it.” Confusion overtook her mind when she heard him and she was about to answer if he was serious when he continued. “That money is the last thing you will ever get from me. From now on, I don’t care if you’re starving in the street, I won’t be giving you any more money.” On instinct, she nodded. A thought about thanking him passed through her mind, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. “Also: the only things you can take with you are your clothes and personal effects. Unfortunately, I did burnt the guitar on my rage, but you can take your keyboard. I won’t have any use for it. Everything else stays.” She stood up and nodded, felling as if a huge weight had been lifted off her.

“Thank you.” She forced herself to say it. It was not as if her father was being actually nice, but she thought that thanking him was better than making him angry by saying something else.

“Tell Scorpia to come in, I will fire her while you start getting your things.” With a nod and a hum as an answer, she went outside and walked towards the car where Scorpia was waiting. She quickly told her what had happened and she went with her back inside the mansion, separating at the entrance as she walked towards her room to get her things.

Before she started climbing the stairs, she noticed her mother standing at the top of them, looking at her the same way she had always did; with disgust.

“I heard everything.” She told her as she finished climbing the stairs. “I was surprised to see he was so calm about this, but I also understand. We’re not missing much if you leave.” She felt a little pain in her heart and lowered her head, avoiding to see the woman that claimed to be her mother. “Good luck though. If I ever see you asking for money on the streets, I might give you a twenty.” She kept walking without stopping and trying not to hear the hurtful words that came out of that woman she had grown to hate.

When she finally got to her room, she closed the door behind her and stopped there for a second, trying to fight back the tears that had started to pool on her eyes, taking deep breathes and looking up at the ceiling of what had been her room for all her life.

Once she felt a little better, she started getting her clothes out of the closet, choosing the things she was going to take, trying to make her luggage as light as possible. After all, she could remember where she was moving to and it was considerably smaller than the mansion.

As she kept taking clothes out, she felt excitement and a little bit of fear overtaking her body.

She was excited to finally be free to do what she wanted, but she was a little scared because of how her father always talked about the world and how awful some jobs could be. It would be a hard journey for her and she didn’t know what was going to happen, but she really felt happy with her decision.

“Hey, I’m sorry. I knocked but you didn’t answer.” Scorpia came in and closed the door behind. “So, I got fired.” The buff woman said and then chuckled, making her giggle in excitement again. “Do you want some help?”

After a little bit more than an hour, she was finally ready to leave. A couple of bags filled with clothes, her backpack filled with some other personal things like her toothbrush, deodorant and things like that, and the huge case she had for her keyboard were everything she would take.

“Catra.” Her father called her when she was at the door, ready to go out and live her life. “If you ever want to come back, you know what you will have to do.” He said authoritatively, turning his back and walking away as if the person leaving was a stranger.

She shrugged the little feeling of sadness she felt at that moment and walked out along with Scorpia, grasping that feeling of freedom again.

“Hey, so… have you ever taken a bus?” The buff woman asked her once they were outside and she looked at her with confusion only to remember that the car she had been driving all this time was his father’s. She shook her head in response. “Well, there’s a first time for everything, right?” The woman smiled and she did too. A smile like no other she had had on her face before. A smile that actually conveyed how happy and free she was feeling at that moment. A smile that made her realize that she could actually show her feelings to people and it felt amazing. A smile that started everything…

* * *

**Adora**

Today had been considerably better than yesterday. Not only was she able to have lunch, she was also able to leave at the hour she was supposed to and it was all thanks to Huntara whom, as soon as their boss left for her monthly meeting, approached her and took half of her work after telling her that she could miss a day at the gym, while Adora couldn’t miss any more of her lessons.

Of course when her boss came back, she couldn’t believe that the blonde had finished all that work by herself, but she couldn’t prove otherwise so she was free to go as soon as her shift was done.

But now the toughest part of her day began; trying to apologize to Catra.

Would she be willing to listen to her? Would she even attend the lessons today? After all, she left early the day before and she seemed like something bad had happened to her.

Well, controlling the future was not something she could do so, shrugging those thoughts from her mind, she entered college a little early (and again, she was really thankful to her co-worker. She should buy her something or at least take her out for dinner someday).

She sat at one of the benches on the courtyard as she waited for her first lesson, smoking a cigarette and watching a few students arriving too for the evening lessons. Some of them looked at her with curiosity, obviously remembering how she had gone crazy yesterday. It kind of made her feel bad, but at the same time it didn’t because she was ready to make things right.

Before her cigarette was done, her eyes landed on a figure she knew. The girl she had been waiting for. The girl that suddenly caused her stomach to turn in nervousness.

Throwing the rest of her cigarette into an ashtray, she walked quickly towards the girl with resolve, not allowing her nervousness to win. After all, the worst thing that could happen was the girl telling her she was a cunt and leaving and, just like her grandma had said, she doesn’t own her any more than an apology, which would be a very quick thing to do even if the girl ran away.

“Catra.” She called her name as soon as she was close to her, making the girl turn to look directly at her eyes, frowning as soon as they made contact.

“What the hell do you want, jerk?” She asked without stopping, her voice conveying a little bit of anger.

“I just wanted to talk to you and…” Before she was finished, the dark haired girl interrupted.

“And yell at me again? No, thank you.” The shorter girl walked a little faster, almost running.

“Wait. It’s not like that. I wanted to apologize.” She was about to grab her by the shoulder to make her stop, but thought that maybe that wasn’t a very bright idea.

“Apologize for what?” Catra suddenly stopped and turned to look at her, anger showing on her face. “You want to apologize because I’m such a huge jerk you had to yell at me and that made you seem like the jerk? No, thank you!” She remarked those last words, a little bit louder but without yelling.

“No, I really do want to apologize.” She lowered her head a little, felling really bad again by listening how the other girl seemed to think of her. With her eyes closed, she waited for the sound of the other girl leaving, but nothing happened.

“Okay then, I’ll listen to you, but let’s not stand in the middle of the courtyard.” As her eyes opened in surprise, she saw the girl walking towards one of the tables outside the cafeteria and she followed her, sitting at the first one they reached before she gathered the courage to start speaking again.

“Thank you, for listening to me.” The rich girl nodded, a frown still on her face, and she kept going. “I don’t want to give you an excuse for how I acted yesterday but, I was really stressed and, I don’t know, it just… I couldn’t… I know I messed up bad. I made you feel bad and I could see you were going through something too. There’s no excuse that can make you think better of me, but I wanted to at least apologize. I took it out on you and you didn’t deserve it. You’re right when you say I’m the jerk.” While she spoke, she was incapable of looking at the girl in front of her, but once she was done, she turned to face her and was surprised to see she was looking at the table with a faint blush on her face.

“You know, I…” Catra started speaking with hesitation, as if she was not sure of what to say. “I’m kind of a jerk too… I’m not really used to… interacting with people so… I can be a little… rough…” A smile appeared in her face and her worry dissipated when she heard that. It seemed as if the girl was really not the kind of person she had thought her to be. Sure, as she said, she was a little rough, but not a real jerk (and she knew about jerks thanks to her boss).

“That’s okay. I mean, we all have boundaries and we are allowed to get mad at someone when they don’t respect them so, I don’t think you’re really a jerk.” The dark haired girl smiled shyly at her and she might be going crazy because that little smile was the cutest thing she had ever seen.

“I get it. Besides, we all have bad days sometimes.” She giggled lightly at her comment.

For a couple of seconds, they sat there in silence and she didn’t feel nervous nor embarrassed or any negative thing. She solved that little issue and, in the process, she might have even made a friend.

Her grandma was right. She shouldn’t have worried too much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that was chapter 7!
> 
> Things are finally moving forward in this relationship! But... how is it going to work now with Catra dropping out of college? That's a question to be answered in the future!
> 
> I hope you're liking it so far! Thank you for your kudos and comments too! I really appreciate them and I try to answer as soon as I can, but you know, life is kinda beating me up lately so, I apologize for my late responses. 
> 
> Anyway; See you next week for chapter 8!


	8. The Fight for Freedom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Catra wants to be herself.  
> Adora wants a new friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter while listening to "Manowar" and the title comes from their song "The Fight for Freedom."

# Chapter 8 – The Fight for Freedom

**Catra**

There was a brief silence after the blonde apologized to her and, in all honesty, it was awkward.

Sure, the blonde apologized and seemed to understand her, but it still felt weird being there with her.

“Well, thank you again for listening to me. I hope we can be friends from now on.” The taller girl spoke, her tone nervous and her face with a fading blush.

“Sure, but…” She stopped abruptly, not knowing if it would be good to tell the other girl that she had just come to college in order to drop out and never come back. It was not the kind of conversation she would like to have with her. Or more like, with anyone right now.

“Hey, it’s okay, I get it. It might be hard for you to think of me as a friend after the way I acted yesterday. Don’t worry. We can be just… acquaintances, or something like that.” Adora scratched her neck while looking at everything but her, an expression of sadness on her face, and she felt a little bad about it. That was not what she meant, she just… wasn’t ready to talk about herself with other people. It felt wrong, even if she knew it was just a thought her parents had implanted on her and there was actually nothing wrong about telling someone else how your life is going or how some things makes you feel. And so, she gave it a try.

“That’s not it. It’s just… I just came here today because I’m dropping out. I’m… doing something else with my life and being friends would be kind of weird since I don’t think we will be seeing each other very much.” Her words came out quickly and she felt a rush through her body, as if she was doing something she shouldn’t do.

As the words left her mouth, a feeling of freedom also engulfed her mind. Nothing mattered now. What if her parents found out about her discussing her life with someone else? They could go and fuck themselves. They couldn’t and, she knew that very well, they wouldn’t care now. She was her own person and it was amazing.

“Really!?” The surprised blonde in front of her brought her back to reality.

“Yeah. I never really liked this career and I was just doing it for my parents.” Well, a little lie there wouldn’t hurt. Even if she was more willing to talk about herself now, that didn’t mean she would tell Adora the story of her life in five minutes.

“Oh, well… That’s good then. You have to do whatever makes you happy.” A warmth spread through her chest at hearing the taller girl. It felt good how she didn’t judge her as she had unconsciously expected, but at the same time, it arose a question: was she desperate for approval? She never had it and it felt really nice right then. She almost wanted to keep talking to the blonde to see if she would approve of some other things about her. God! Her parents really did make a number on her. She was messed up. “But I mean, we could still be friends if you want.” She was again taken out of her thoughts. “You know, I have lunch with a couple of friends every Sunday, maybe you could join us this week. If you want, obviously. Don’t feel pressured or anything.” The girl chuckled nervously and she couldn’t help but giggle at that. What could have happened to her yesterday to make her so stressed and angry? She seemed like a goofball now. Then again, not everyone had a happy, easy life and she was pretty sure the blonde didn’t, if the bags under her eyes and her previous behavior told her something.

“I wouldn’t like to intrude and… honestly, I’m not that good at… talking…” She started speaking with confidence that quickly died as she continued. She had said that without thinking and now she was embarrassed, not used to showing that weak side of her.

“Don’t worry. My friends are nice and I swear I will never yell at you again. Besides, we’re not really that good at talking either. We mostly complain about life and talk about how one day we will be successful people. It’s kind of silly, to be honest.” It was obvious to her that Adora was rambling without thinking, a thing that made her giggle again. “But like I said, don’t feel pressured. It would be nice to have you there, but I wouldn’t like for you to do something you don’t want to do.” And that got her thinking about herself again.

When she first started college, one of her short term goals had been to make friends. Real friends, not the acquainted rich kids she had to put up with at every event she attended with her family. It was difficult, of course. She had so much shit already installed in her mind she instantly judged people without thinking and she knew she sometimes spoke those nasty words out loud. Her most recent memory of that was with the blonde in front of her, when she accidentally said something she didn’t want to and that, ultimately, resulted in a huge introspection where she learned that she hates herself more than she thought before. Would it be cool to try and make friends with Adora and her friends? What if she said something awful again? But then again, she couldn’t live the rest of her life in fear. She needed to move forward. She was now free to do, say and think whatever she wanted. She needed to take risks.

“Okay… if you’re sure I’m not imposing…” She said shyly, looking at the table as if it was the most interesting object in the world while trying not to look at the girl in front of her. There was a little voice inside her head telling her everything would go wrong, but she did her best to silence it.

“Nonsense. I wouldn’t invite you otherwise.” She heard movement coming from the blonde’s seat and she raised her head a little, watching her taking out her phone from her backpack. “Why don’t you give me your number and I can text you the details later. I mean, we say we get together for lunch, but we just have breakfast some times and even dinner so… yeah…” The girl rambled again, earning another giggle from her. Could she be doing that on purpose? It felt genuine and she liked that. It seemed like she really had a big misunderstanding regarding the blonde’s personality.

“Sure…” And so, she hesitantly gave her the number. Crippling, almost unconscious fear aside.

After all, she was basically starting a new life. She couldn’t get stuck with what she already knows and thinks. This was her opportunity to really know the world her father complains about so much. What if she got hurt? She would cross that bridge once she got there. Right now, she just wanted to try everything she had never tried before because of the jerks that controlled her life. She was sure it couldn’t get any worse than that.

**Adora**

When she got home that night, she felt like she was floating on cloud nine.

Not only had she been able to solve her little squabble, she had also made a new friend. A very cute new friend. It was weird how she didn’t notice her cuteness way before. Maybe because of how chaotic her life had been recently, but now that she spoke to her for a while, she couldn’t think about anything else. Okay, that was maybe too dramatic. She did think that the girl is cute, but she doesn’t have a crush or anything. Maybe she was just overly excited about that development.

“That’s a smile I like to see. I take it everything went well?” Her grandma asked her as soon as she got to the living room where she was watching TV on the old couch. She sat beside her and sighed in relief.

“You were right, like usual. It went so well I made a new friend. A new, cute friend” She spoke with happiness as her grandma put her hand in her arm and shook it with a giggle.

“No. You were right, I just told you why. Now, tell me more about this cutie. I want to hear every detail. Your love life gossip is what gives me strength to keep living!” They both laughed at the old woman’s comment before she answered.

“It’s not like that. I mean, she is cute, but we’re just going to be friends.” Her grandma turned the TV off to focus completely on her.

“Oh, of course. That’s why you remarked the word ‘cute’ when you told me you had a new friend.” She giggled nervously at Razz’s words.

“Because she is cute, but that’s it. I’m not looking for a relationship right now and we’re just friends.” The woman shook her head in disapproval as she hummed.

“I don’t buy it. I’ve heard that before with a certain girl. I know you just ended things up with her, but that doesn’t mean you have to wait years before finding someone else. You never know when it comes to love. You just need to give it a try and hope that it won’t end like it did with that girl, Lonnie.” She couldn’t help but giggle at the enthusiasm her grandma showed when talking about love.

“I get it, but we’re just friends. I think… I messed up and we patched things up. It’s too early to think about something else. Physical attraction is not everything.” She said trying to finish that subject, but of course, her stubborn grandma was not over yet.

“That’s right, but bread is not the only thing that feeds the man. We need meat.” A loud cackle escaped her mouth at her grandma’s words.

“Razz, you naughty woman!” She spoke after laughing and the woman at her side just shrugged her shoulders.

“It’s the truth, dear. You’re a young, healthy woman. No one can blame you for getting horny. Especially if the girl is really cute. Casual sex is not a bad thing.” Another laugh came out and she hugged her grandma tightly.

“I wish you could live forever. I would be really lost if I ever lose you.” Her grandma hugger her too and she rested her head on the woman’s shoulder.

“What are you talking about? I’m barely in my eighties. I’m just as young as you are.” They both giggled a little. “Besides, I know you wouldn’t be lost. Just look at what you did today. You had a problem, found a solution and solved it by yourself. You’re already a very capable woman. I should be the one scared. One of these days I will be too much and you will end up throwing me into a retirement home.” Her grandma caressed her left cheek with one of her hands and she took said hand in hers.

“I would never do that. You’re all I have.” The woman suddenly broke the hug, startling her a little.

“Come on, let’s not get sad now.” Her grandma took her cane and stoop up quickly. “I woke up with a lot of energy today and I baked some pie. Let’s go have some while we keep talking about that cute girl that just became your friend.” She giggled and stood up too, following her grandma.

After having dinner, they both went to sleep, but before doing so, she checked her phone to see if she had any new texts. She didn’t check it during college so she had a few from her friends.

**Softy:** _Are we getting together this Sunday? I want to hear all the new office gossip you have **.**_

**DramaQueen:** _Sure. I just hope I don’t get too much homework so that we can stay longer than last time._

**Softy:** _Same. I swear, college is awful._

**DramaQueen:** _Is 12 okay for everyone?_

**Softy:** _Am or pm?_

**DramaQueen:** _Am. I’m taking you both to an alien orgy._

**DramaQueen:** _Of course 12pm! It’s lunch, Bow_ **.**

**Softy:** _That’s why Adora has your number saved as DramaQueen_ **.**

**DramaQueen:** _That’s because she wants to die young_.

**DramaQueen:** _I’m not a drama queen **.**_

**Softy:** _Of course not, miss alien orgy_.

**DramaQueen:** _Fuck you_.

She laughed as she read the small conversation her friends had before she answered anything. Were all friends as weird as they were? Well, if Catra was going to join them, she might find out.

“ _12 is okay by me. Is it okay if I bring another friend with me?”_ She replied quickly, letting her phone on her bed to change into her pajamas (which were really just her underwear and an old shirt). Once she did, she turned off the light of her little room and sat on her bed to see if she got an answer already.

**Softy** : _Sure. I hope said friend is as cute as the last friend you brought. But without the cheating, of course. You deserve as much._

**DramaQueen** : _OMG! You made a new friend and you haven’t told me?_

**DramaQueen** : _I swear Adora, you need to stop being afraid of what everyone would think of you so we can have lunch together at work._

**Softy** : _Why are you the one complaining? I don’t even work with you! I have to wait a whole week to see how you’re doing._

“ _It’s not like that, Bow. And I haven’t told any of you because it just happened today_ ” She replied quickly, lying on her bed to get ready to sleep.

**DramaQueen** : _Okay then, I will let it slide, but my point still stands. Stop being afraid to tell people about our friendship!_

**DramaQueen** : _I’m really tired of eating lunch with my dad. The kind of food he eats is… ew!_

**Softy** : _It was funny when he hunt down that grasshopper to eat it. Best sleepover ever._

**DramaQueen** : _Ugh, don’t even remind me of that._

**DramaQueen** : _I love him but he’s just so weird sometimes_.

**DramaQueen** : _But whatever. We’re having lunch together tomorrow, Adora. You need to start living your life without worrying about what others think._

_“Okay mom, I know you’re doing it for my sake even if I wouldn’t like that. Thank you, mom.”_ She replied between giggles.

**DramaQueen** : _Jesus Freaking Christ!_

**DramaQueen** : _I hope this new friend of yours is not as dumb as you both_. 

_“Don’t worry mom, she’s fine, but I will let it up to you to decide if I can be friends with her._ ” She could imagine her friend’s face at that moment. Drama as usual. And so, she couldn’t help but giggle again.

**DramaQueen** : _I swear I’m gonna slap you in front of the whole office tomorrow!_

“ _Please don’t, mom. I gotta go sleep. See ya’_ ” Without waiting for an answer, she locked her phone and left it on the nightstand.

Even if her day had been tiring, she couldn’t really sleep. She was weirdly overexcited about her new friend. She even thought about texting her right then and telling her when they would get together, but at the same time, she knew she really needed to sleep. Only God knows what her boss would have waiting for her tomorrow and, if Glimmer was really going to make her eat lunch with her, it could be a very tiring day so, trying to dissipate her thoughts, she closed her eyes and went to sleep, hoping for better days to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I'm finally back again. 
> 
> It's been a chaotic month for me, but it's almost over. 
> 
> Anyway; Now things are starting to actually move forward.
> 
> There's just one thing I want to be clear about: I mentioned sex in this chapter, but I don't really have plans to write something like that in this story. I had a lot of fun when I did it on my previous fic, "Pentagram", but I don't feel like this one needs the spiciness. What I do have to warn you about right now is that, in chapters to come, we will be dealing with panic attacks, internalized homophobia and some other things that I will be sure to warn you again before they pop up in the story. 
> 
> I hope you're enjoying this as much as I am enjoying writing it and I thank you all for your comments and kudos! I also apologize again for not being able to answer your comments sooner, but I'll try harder to do it! 
> 
> I'll also try to post the next chapter as soon as I can. 
> 
> See you next week!


	9. The Road

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Catra learns a couple of things.  
> Adora has some on-the-job drama.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter while listening to "Lords of the Trident" and the title comes from their song "The Road".

# Chapter 9 – The Road

**Catra**

After her conversation with Adora that evening, Catra had learned a huge lesson: if you’re using public transportation, you can’t get lost in your thoughts or you’re going to miss your stop just like she did.

She had been so absorbed replaying the conversation and feeling all giddy when thinking about having new friends that she ended up at the last stop, lost and really afraid because it was getting dark. That was a great start to her new life, for sure.

In the end, everything turned out fine thanks to a nice woman explaining to her that the very same bus took the same route to go back so, in that little trip, she learned two things: 1) Don’t get lost in your thoughts and 2) Busses don’t go just one way (which should have been pretty obvious, honestly).

Finally, after another hour of ride, she got to her new place and was greeted by a very worried Scorpia on the verge of tears.

“Catra! Jesus, I thought something happened to you! I was literally about to call the police! Thank god you’re okay.” The buff woman hugged her while rambling and she couldn’t help but get a nice feeling. It felt nice knowing someone’s actually worried about you.

“Is everything okay? We really were about to call the police.” Perfuma, Scorpia’s girlfriend, asked her with the same worried tone as she put a hand on her girlfriend’s shoulder to calm her down.

“I’m okay, it’s just…” And then she explained the whole bus thing to both of them even if she felt like dying from embarrassment. If something similar had happened with her parents, she was sure they would have punished her for being so dumb, which is why it felt nice to see both women relieved and not judging her after she finished her story.

“I’m glad it turned out okay.” The big woman told her. They had both taken a seat in the living room while the blonde woman went to make some tea.

“I’m glad too. It was… quite an experience.” She answered as Perfuma came back and sat beside her girlfriend.

“I bet. Something similar happened to me back when I was in high school. I fell asleep in the bus and when I woke up, I was really scared because I didn’t know where I was.” The white haired girl said between chuckles, making all of them giggle too. “Of course, I can laugh about it now, but it was awful.” They all laughed and then there was a short, peaceful silence before the thin woman spoke.

“So, Catra. I spoke to one of my friends to see if they have a job for you and they said they have one. You wanna hear about it or do you wanna go to sleep? We can talk about it later, if you want.” She thought about the woman’s words for a second. On one hand, she was really tired and wanted to go to sleep. On the other hand, she knew she needed to find a job soon to not be a burden to the women that had so nicely taken her in.

“It’s okay, I’m not really tired.” After her answer, a loud, scratchy sound, came from the kitchen.

“I’ll bring the tea.” Scorpia got up and left while Perfume started talking again.

“Well, my friend Mermista and her boyfriend own a restaurant pretty close from my shop and she said they’re looking for a waitress. Also, they recently remodeled and now the restaurant has a stage in which they have some live music every now and then. I told her you could play the keyboard and she said you could also get up there and play some tunes whenever you want.” That last part sounded kind of scary but also exciting to her, the problem was the first part. She had never done anything remotely close to being a waitress. She had never even picked up her dishes after she ate. What if she messed up and ended up breaking something? “Of course, this is just the first thing I could get you so, don’t feel pressured into taking the job if you don’t like it. I can keep asking around or maybe you can find something online. Whatever you want.”

“No. I mean… It sounds nice but…” She took a deep breath before continuing. Lately, she had been saying a lot of things about herself that showed “weakness”, as her father said, and she kind of felt uncomfortable with it, but she knew she had to overcome the feeling. “I’m a little bit… scared… I’ve never had a job before. What if I mess things up? I wouldn’t like to put you into a difficult position with your friend because of how useless I am.” The woman got closer to her and took her hand in hers, looking at her in a weird way no one had looked at her. Was it pity? It kind of felt like that, but different. She just couldn’t place the right feeling.

“Don’t say that about yourself. Scorpia has told me about all the things you can do and I don’t know if you remember, but I also attended your last piano recital, even if I had to leave early because of that awful food. I know you’re a very capable woman. Don’t sell yourself short.” The words stung her heart in a nice way, making her feel a warmth spreading through her stomach too. “And just like I told you before: you don’t have to take this one. We can keep looking around until we find something you’re comfortable with.”

“Thank you…” In her mind, she was playing it cool, but as soon as she spoke her voice broke a little and she suddenly felt something hot on her face. Why was she crying now? Was it really that nice to hear what Perfuma said? Well… it seems like it was…

“It’s fine.” The woman hugged her suddenly and she reciprocated without even thinking about it. “You can think about it tonight and tell me what you think tomorrow” She whispered as she patted her head lightly, making her feel like a kid in her mother’s arms. Or that’s what she thought it felt like. Her mother never anything like that with her.

“Oh, are we hugging now?” Scorpia entered the living room with a tray filled with cookies and three cups of tea that she quickly left in the coffee table to join them in the hug.

Was that feeling she had something like love? Like, the love you have towards your family? Was it something else? She was not sure, thanks to her parents’ cold treatment, but it was one of the nicest feelings she had ever had in her life. Maybe that was why people always spoke highly about the benefits of having a family. She never understood that until now because, if that was the feeling she had, then it was more amazing than she thought. She was glad she left her home for that now. It was more like, she left a house to live in a real home.

* * *

**Adora**

She had always avoided drama all her life as much as she could. If someone yelled at her, she just stood there and did nothing. If someone did something she didn’t like, she just took it quietly and kept going with her life. That was how it usually was for her. At least until she entered college and things started to fall apart.

First, she got into a heated argument with her now ex-girlfriend (a drama so bad that it almost felt like a really bad episode of a cheap telenovela), then she yelled at one of her classmates because of her stress and now she was the reason why Glimmer and her boss were yelling at each other.

It all started at lunch time, when the pink haired girl had come to her desk like she had told her the night before, only to find her drowning in paperwork that was handed to her last-minute by her boss. She told her friend that it would be impossible for her to have lunch that day if she wanted to get to college on time.

The real bomb exploded when Huntara also came to her desk to go to lunch and saw the pile of work on her desk.

“Damn. The boss’ making you do her paperwork again? What a bitch.” She wouldn’t lie about one thing, and that was how funny it was for her to see Glimmer’s face go from confusion to surprise and then to anger in less than a second. Sadly, things didn’t end in a funny way, since now Glimmer was yelling at her boss so loud that, even if they were in a closed room, everyone could hear them.

Of course she tried to stop her, but her short friend was a force of nature and it was impossible. She could only watch anxiously all that drama unfolding in front of her.

“I fucked up, didn’t I?” Huntara asked her when she saw her all nervous. The buff woman seemed worried but at the same time, amused by the situation.

“It’s okay. It had to happen eventually.” She sighed loudly, trying to calm her nerves.

“I didn’t know you were actually friends with her. I thought you both hated each other.” She looked around at the office before answering. Everyone was doing as if they were still working instead of going to lunch, waiting to see how this whole drama ended, making her sigh again.

“I didn’t want anyone to know because we’ve been friends for so long. His father too is a very close friend to my grandma. I thought it would be troublesome if people found out. You know like, they would say that, whatever I earned, was just because I knew the HR people.” She felt a hand patting her back lightly as she took a deep breath.

“Come on, I don’t think anyone in this office would have thought like that. We all see how hard you work. Sure, some of them like gossip, but this isn’t a teenage movie.” She chuckled at the woman’s comment and then she heard a loud noise coming from the office her friend was, as if something had fallen and broken. The door opened suddenly too and the pink haired girl stood there, looking at the person inside.

“If you’re not capable of doing your own job, maybe we will find someone who can!” She yelled loudly before turning to finally exit the office, but stopped for a second and turned around again. “And I’m sorry I accidentally broke that little cat doll, I’ll pay you for that!” She turned around again and finally came out of the office, closing the door with a loud thud. Everyone in the office turned to look at the pink-haired girl as she walked towards the blonde, still frowning in anger.

“Hey, Am I still employed?” She asked playfully once the girl was close to her.

“You bet you are. And God help that bitch if she tries to fire you. I will come down again and put her head inside her stinky little…” The blonde interrupted her with a loud cackle that came out louder than she would have liked it to.

“I get it. There’s no need to explain further.” She put her arm around the short girl’s shoulder and patter her head lightly, as if trying to calm her.

“I just spoke to her for a couple minutes and I hate her already. I don’t know how you are able to see her every day and not go crazy.” The girl sighed, calming herself and making her giggle in the process.

“Bills don’t pay themselves and hunger doesn’t wait so…” Her friend removed her arm from her shoulders and interrupted her, starting to walk towards the elevator that would take them to the break room.

“You’re right. Let’s go to lunch then.” At that sentence, she looked at her desk and the pile of work on it, worry showing on her face.

“Is it really okay though? I mean… I still have to do all that.” The shorter girl turned back and walked towards her. Once in front of her, she smacked her lightly on the cheek.

“That woman will do her own share of work. I told her that, if I get word that you even touch a single paper from her work pile, she will get fired for not meeting the requirements of the job. Basically, being able to do her damn job. So, let’s go to lunch because I’m starving.” At her friend’s words, she felt a little bit of relief. Her work always piled up because of that reason and it would be really amazing not having to fill her boss’ reports about things she didn’t fully understand (she was already studying to get a degree and learn all that, but she was no genius) or know. She honestly never got why no one complained about the reports she filled. Where they doing a really great job in the teamwork department? She didn’t know, but damn she wrote beautiful words about how much that team felt like a family. Where their investments paying off? She was not in charge of that work, but of course she always said everything was amazing.

“I’m actually starving too so, let’s go to lunch and you both can tell me about this weird friendship I just found out.” The buff woman put an encouraging hand on her shoulder.

“Fine. But I’m filling up a detailed complain about violence in the workplace with HR.” She said jokingly, knowing full well that the little smack her friend gave her didn’t even hurt.

“Sure, I’ll wait for it at my desk.” They both chuckled at the comment while they walked towards the elevator.

Now that everyone knew she was friends with the HR department, things might change, but it actually felt good. She would stop getting so much work and maybe her boss would stop being a jerk too.

Maybe using your contacts every now and then was not as bad as she had thought, especially if one of them is your best friend. Or well, one of your best friends.

At that moment, the blonde remembered something she was going to do at lunch but thought she wouldn’t be able to do it because of the amount of work she had; she needed to text Catra and tell her about their lunch on Sunday.

She was actually really pumped up about that last night and, now that her responsibilities just went down considerably, she felt giddy about it again.

She wanted to see that cute girl she definitely didn’t have a crush on. Yeah. That was impossible. Those things only happened in movies because of how short those are.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I'm back again with the new chapter. 
> 
> I had to use this one to move the story a little forward, but fear not, because next chapter will be full of Catradora interactions. 
> 
> I hope you're liking this "each character learns a new thing from life at all times" shit I'm writing. It's kind of cheese, but I felt it was the right choice (since I am making the characters grow) to understand why they think the way they do. I'm also trying to use the real traumas they showed in the show (Like, trust issues for Catra and "hero complex" for Adora). 
> 
> But whatever; I remember I said this story would be ten chapters long and look where we are: at chapter nine and not even close to the end. 
> 
> Anyway: I'll do my best to have the next chapter ready for next week, but I'm really bussy these last few days (I was fixing a couple things in the house I'm moving out of and that little project turned to be a huge remodelation for the house) so I can't promise anything, but I'll surely try. 
> 
> Thank you for reading and for commenting (and I'm sorry it takes me so long to answer) and also for all your kudos!


	10. Falling Into You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Catra is nervous.   
> Adora has some inner conflict.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter while listening to "Sebastian Bach" and the title comes from his song, "Falling Into You".

# Chapter 10 - Falling Into You

**Catra**

Sunday was finally here and it brought anxiety along for the ride, because that day she was going to have lunch with three strangers (well, she knew Adora, but the girl was basically a stranger to her).

In the past couple days she had been doing a lot of new things and, surprisingly for her, everything had gone smoothly. Life didn’t seem as hard as her father had told her (or maybe she was talking too soon).

She had accepted the offer to work as a waitress, even though she had never done anything remotely close to it, and she spent her first day with her hands trembling in nervousness. Every time she had to take food to a table, her stomach sunk and her palms got sweaty. When customers asked for the check, she always checked twice to make sure they were being charged the correct amount. The last thing she wanted was to get yelled at because she made a mistake.

Thankfully, the owner, Mermista, and her boyfriend, Seahawk, had been really nice to her. Or well, Seahawk was. Mermista was “a little rough around the edges”, according to her boyfriend.

There was also another person helping her to serve the costumers. A young person that called themselves “Double Trouble” and she had no idea if that was their real name, but she sure as hell was not going to ask. After all, the last thing she wanted was conflict and that question could have brought some of that.

Double Trouble had also been nice to her. They were always behind her as if they were her shadow, always there to help whenever she had needed them to.

_“You’re so on guard all the time, girl. Like a kitty on a cage filled with rabid dogs.”_ They had told her at the end of her first shift. _“Just loosen up. You’re doing a great job.”_ Those words did wonders to her confidence and so, the next day went smooth too.

And now, she had to face another challenge. Socializing with people that could very well be aliens for her. Raised in a completely different way, with different beliefs and attitudes.

Of course it was not her first time socializing, but the kind of conversations she was used to, was just a bunch of boring stuff like school, ideas for new businesses, politics and all that nonsense that adults liked to talk about and their children imitated.

What could she talk about with these new people? She was not allowed to watch TV, which she knew was one of the most popular hobbies nowadays (or at least, she thought it was). She didn’t know anything about movies or video games either. Even when talking about music, her expertise stopped in classical music and her guilty pleasure, Spanish flamenco. Was Paco de Lucía a rockstar? She doubted that. Do people even like rockstars nowadays? How could she be so closed to the world her father so much wanted her to dominate?

And sure, as a refined lady who was always taught to learn by herself, she did some research every time she could.

She found the most popular things today and tried to listen, watch and do some of them, but after a while, she realized that it would be impossible to learn everything in just a few days. Pop culture was so big she even thought about it like the universe; a thing that is already huge and expands every second.

During her research, she remembered a few things her father had prohibited for her and searched them. One specially: Rock music.

While listening to the third song she found by a band called AC/DC, she realized why her father had told her never to listen to that kind of music; Rock was actually fun, unlike the man that birthed her.

Drummers were passionate, bassists were impressive, vocalists were dynamic and guitarist were good (but just that. She hadn’t heard any guitarist come even close to Paco de Lucía’s talent). Rock concerts were huge and filled with energy. So much energy that she even felt like moving around like the people she saw on the video.

There was only one sad part about it all, and it was the fact that rock music was not popular anymore so, even if she was into it, she knew she couldn’t talk about it with the people she would be meeting for the first time today.

And so, there she was: Outside the dinner they had agreed to meet, waiting for the blonde to show up while spiders roamed through her belly and cold sweat pooled on her palms. A thought repeating itself again and again inside her head: **_“only speak when they ask something.”_**

“Hey, Catra! I’m glad you could come.” She turned to the voice calling her, seeing the blonde at her side and feeling another wave of nervousness engulfing her body. She could only nod, acknowledging the girl’s presence. “Are you the first one to get here?”

“I… guess…” She managed to answer, feeling her throat dry.

“Oh, yeah. I’m such an idiot. Of course you wouldn’t know because you don’t know Bow and Glim.” Adora laughed shortly at her own comment and she couldn’t help but giggle too. “Let’s get inside and see if they’re here already.” The blonde opened the door and she walked behind her, thinking about how different the girl looked without that suit she had always been wearing. And well, of course she wouldn’t be wearing it now since she doesn’t work on Sundays, right? Office hours where just Monday to Friday, if she remembered correctly. Anyway: the girl in front of her looked younger, taller and even happier than the last time she saw her. Even the dark bags under her eyes were gone. Could casual clothes really do all that for a person? Maybe she was wearing makeup.

“It seems like we’re the first ones to arrive so, why don’t we start ordering something? I’m actually starving.” The taller girl sat at a table close to the window that looked to the street and she sat in front of her, leaving space for someone else to sit beside her.

“Yeah… sure…” She usually wouldn’t order something to eat until everyone expected to be there arrived, but if the blonde said it was okay, maybe it was actually fine. Her manners might be just something rich people do and not only was she not rich anymore, she was also trying to let that part of her life behind.

* * *

**Adora**

As soon as they sat down at a table, a waitress had come to give them a couple of menus and they both started looking at them. Or well, she was trying to, but she was getting distracted by the girl in front of her.

It’s not as if she was doing something odd or flashy. Catra was actually just reading the menu, but she just couldn’t miss how cute the shorter girl looked today. Well, she always looked cute, if she remembered correctly, but today she looked especially cute. Had she dressed up for lunch? No, her clothes looked just like any casual clothes anyone would wear. Then, what changed? She wondered.

The girl with messy hair was looking at the menu in deep concentration, as if she was doing a math equation while reading it. It was honestly funny, but also, cute.

_“Keep it in your pants, Adora. She’s just a friend. She might not even be gay so, behave!”_ She told herself before taking a deep breath to calm down.

“Hey, Adora?” Catra’s voice took her out of her thoughts. “What is a ‘smoothie’?” She asked her with a confused face that made her chuckle while the other girl blushed from embarrassment in front of her.

“Well, that’s… I don’t actually know how to describe it. Like a milkshake but with fruit? I’m not entirely sure if that’s the right way to describe it, but the taste is really good.” The dark haired girl nodded in understanding and then went back to look at the menu fully concentrated.

“I’m not sure what to ask for. I’ve never tried any of this.” Her comment made the blonde laugh, remembering that she was a rich girl who probably eats only in the nicest places.

“Okay then, let me recommend something for you.” She got up and walked around the table to sit at Catra’s side while she only looked at her, as if she didn’t know what she was doing. “Here…” The blonde pointed at the menu and the shorter girl looked at it.

“A burger?” More than disgusted, the dark haired girl’s tone sounded surprised and her eyes shone as if in expectation. She knew the rich girl probably had never eaten a burger, but that reaction was so weird it made her think that maybe she had always wanted to eat one and never could. But that could be just a stupid thought, so she just hummed and nodded as an answer.

“It also comes with fries and it goes great with a chocolate milkshake.” Catra suddenly left the menu on the table and looked at her with a smile, her eyes still shining.

“That’s it! I’ll have a burger.” The rich girl’s voice sounded very excited, as if she was a little kid on his first day going to a fast food restaurant with a playground. She was blindingly cute.

“That’s great. You can never go wrong with that combo.” She called the waitress and then looked back at the shorter girl, still beaming with happiness and looking at the menu as if she couldn’t believe she was about to eat a burger. She had been so enticed by the girl that she didn’t even notice when her two other friends arrived.

“Hey! Sorry we’re late. Bow picked me up but then I forgot my wallet and we had to go back.” Glimmer sat in front of Catra, leaving space for Bow to sit beside her. “I can see you’re hungry already.” She spoke softly, insinuating something else that she quickly understood and made her blush with a nervous chuckle, hoping that the girl beside her didn’t pick up on the innuendo.

“Yeah. Besides, she took forever getting ready, but she would never admit it.” Bow spoke playfully, saving her from the embarrassment.

“Beauty takes its time.” The pink haired girl ran a hand through her hair playfully, making them laugh.

She turned to look at the dark haired girl beside her and saw that her face had turned from a happy and excited expression to a neutral one. Behind the table, she could see the girl’s hands moving her fingers nervously.

“So, this is Catra. She’s a friend from college.” She put a hand on the shorter girl’s shoulder while she spoke, encouraging her and trying to help her not to feel nervous.

“It’s a pleasure meeting you.” Catra spoke, her tone neutral and her body stiff.

“Come on! We’re all friends here. You don’t have to talk as if this is a business meeting.” The pink haired girl spoke after a giggle. “I’m Glimmer, and this fool beside me is my boyfriend Bow.”

“Hey! Not only did you call me a fool, you didn’t even let me introduce myself.” Before anyone could say anything else, the waitress finally arrived and excused herself for the delay, asking if they knew what to order already.

They all ordered their usual and started chatting casually about how things were going in their lives. The conversation was just as nice as it always was and she always made sure to try and include Catra, who seemed to be having at least a little bit of fun. At least she had started laughing when someone made a joke.

When their food arrived, it didn’t escape her how excited the dark haired girl was. She saw her taking the burger with her hands and biting a huge portion of it. Without waiting much, the girl then drank from her milkshake and a sound of pleasure escaped her mouth. It was like watching a kid happily open his Christmas presents; really cute.

She looked at the girl for so long that she even forgot they weren’t alone until Glimmer’s foot hit her in the shinbone. The pink haired girl had a smug smile on her face and, once she looked at her, the girl gave her a thumbs up without saying anything. She then looked at Bow, who did the exact same thing with the exact same face. A sigh got out of her mouth without her knowing and she rolled her eyes as she took a couple of fries from her plate to eat them.

“So, Catra…” Glimmer started speaking, the smug smile still on her face and her eyes going from Adora to the girl beside her. “Are you single?” The dark haired girl put her burger down and took a napkin to wipe her mouth before answering. Without her knowing, there was a knot in the blonde’s stomach.

“Yes. I don’t have a boyfriend now.” Her heart sunk a little at the answer while the pink haired girl only nodded.

If she said “boyfriend” so specifically, that had to mean she was not gay, which she had already thought about, but still, she couldn’t help the little sadness that came along with that realization. Even though she had said so herself; they were only going to be friends.

“So, are you looking for someone right now? Maybe a strong, reliable man or a gorgeous, hard working woman.” Adora was about to say something to stop the conversation or change the subject, but the girl beside her spoke first, as if she was unbothered by the topic.

“Well, right now I’m not looking for anyone, really. I just want to get enough money to study and then… I don’t know…” That “looking for anyone” gave her a little bit of hope she didn’t know if she even wanted to have. They were supposed to be just friends but, would it be bad if she flirted with her… just a little?

“I get you. If I didn’t know Bow since we were children, I would think the same. So, you’re open to the idea of having a girlfriend? Because I know a few girls who would be just your type.” At Glimmer word’s, she felt her world crumbling and she wanted to be swallowed by the earth. She really wanted to stop that conversation that was heading towards her early demise, but Catra kept answering, unaware of her inner turmoil.

“Well, I’ve never thought about that, but I’ve never had a boyfriend either and I live with a gay couple so… I don’t know… I’m opened to the idea but, maybe not now.” The dark haired girl’s words put her heart back into place and made it work at full capacity. She had a chance if she wanted. And she wanted that… right? She said “not now” so… And besides, she just ended a long relationship too so, maybe this was not the right time.

“You’ve never had a couple then!?” Bow’s voice was really loud, conveying his surprise quite well and making the rich girl blush.

“I never had the time and… I didn’t feel like having one before.” Finally, it seemed like, after seeing the girl all flustered, her friends had decided to change the subject and started talking about Glimmer’s awfully long list of boyfriends she got in order to make Bow jealous.

And at that moment, she stopped paying attention to her friends and kept thinking about the girl that was still beside her, eating her burger again and smiling widely with each bite she took. Her mind split in two sides; the one she thought was the “lucid” one, telling her to wait and just be friends with the girl and the other side telling her to go ahead and start flirting like her life depended on it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I'm not dead! It's been a rough couple of weeks, but I finally got some time off to write.   
> We're reaching the end of the story (I know, it hasn't been long, but I don't like to stretch things up when there's no reason for it). I think there's only like 3 chapters left. But let me warn you: next chapter will be heavy (I'll write a proper warning before the chapter once I know how much shit I can put into it). I've said before that I love happy endings, but they mean nothing to me if there was not angst or sadness before them so, you've been warned.   
> I have to thank you again for your comments and kudos and I also have to apologize for not being able to reply sooner. Moving out of my old house really took longer than I expected (and it also took part of my spine from carrying all that forniture) so, I apologize.   
> Now that I'm finished moving, I think I will be able to update the story weekly as I used to so, I'll see you next week!


	11. City Lights

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Catra deals with her parent's everlasting words on her head.  
> Adora has a family situation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING!  
> This chapter contains some homophobia on Catra's POV. It wasn't written to hurt or diminish anyone, but to understand the character better.

# Chapter 11 – City Lights

**Catra**

It had been a few days since she got together with some strangers and walked out of the diner with some friends. One of the more frightening experiences of her life, if she had to be honest. Yet, it all ended up nicely for her.

They got along pretty well and they even added her to their group chat, where they occasionally shared memes, asked each other silly questions and agreed to meet whenever they could.

During their lunch, she had told them about her job and had also told them how the owner of the restaurant would let her play a few tunes on her keyboard from time to time. They were very encouraging and supportive, and that made her feel stronger than ever, like she could do anything she wanted to do.

Also, it seemed that they were friends with her bosses, Mermista and Seahawk. Apparently, Adora used to go to the gym and met Seahawk there, starting a “gruesome” competition to see who would be able to lift the heaviest weights there. When the blonde decided to start college, she stopped going to the gym but, according to her friends, she had always been the champion, which didn’t seem like a false story. Oh, no. She had looked at the girl’s arms a couple of times after that story and, even if she had stopped going to the gym, they looked rock solid still.

That last thought about the blonde had sparked new thoughts about topics her parents hated to talk about.

She could remember how Glimmer asked her about dating girls and she replied as if on instinct that she would be opened to the idea, but after replying, a voice in her head that sounded just like her father started attacking her mind with poison.

_“That would be disgusting and improper.”_ The voice started, going louder and louder by the second; homophobia at its worst, just like anything the man seemed to do and show her.

_“If you think about that even once, I will send you to a madhouse.”_ Her mother’s voice had joined her father’s after a while, spitting venom inside her head in a moment she had expected to have fun.

Thankfully, another question from the pink haired girl had made those thoughts disappear, but only for a while.

After that lunch, she had gone to Mermista’s to work her last shift of the week. On her journey there, the thoughts came back and, even though she had been focusing on her job, she could hear all that in the back of her head. Words she didn’t believe, coming from people she didn’t really love. Why did they linger on her mind so much?

When she got home that evening, still thinking about those stupid things, Perfuma had asked her with worry if something had happened, and she decided to confide in her. The woman had proven to be a great friend and someone willing to help so, maybe she could help her getting those thoughts out for good.

“I was just remembering some things my parents said.” She spoke as she took a seat on a chair in front of a small table.

“Well, I’ve never met them but, just with what I’ve seen and heard, I can tell you that it would be better for you to not remember whatever they said.” The woman sat beside her, looking at her with worry on her face.

“I know. I don’t want to but… they just come back to poison my head every time I’m having fun.” At her sigh, the white haired woman took her hand and squeezed it in support.

“At least you had fun right? That can help you replace the awful thoughts.” A smile found its way to her face. A small one, but meaningful. Expressing the comfort the woman’s presence gave her.

“I did have fun. I mean… after I stopped being so nervous.” They both giggled a little and then she sighed again.

“You know I will always be here to hear you, right? Me and Scorpia, of course. Not only when you have a problem. You can also tell us when you have fun, when you’re excited, whatever happens to you. We will be here for you.” Her eyes started to get watery at her words, but just chuckled and swallowed, stopping the tears from coming out.

“Thank you. I had fun, like I said but, there was a part of the conversation that just… I don’t know… it brought me back to them.” The last word came out of her mouth filled with hatred she didn’t even know she had in her.

“Do you want to talk about it?” The woman squeezed her hand in support again and she nodded lightly, starting to choose her words before they came out of her mouth.

“A… friend… asked me if I would be open to the idea of dating women. I have honestly never thought about it but, out of spite for what my parents think about gay people, I instinctively said that I would. After that, I just couldn’t get them out of my head.” There was a brief silence after her words, as if the woman beside her was thinking about the right ones to say to her.

“And… if you were to give it an honest thought, would you really be open to the idea? That might have been what created the conflict that brought their words back.” There was a loud shrieking sound that broke the silence that had appeared again after Perfuma’s words. “I’m sorry, I was going to make some tea. Do you want some?” She nodded as the woman stood up to make the tea, a thousand things going through her head.

Would she be opened to a gay relationship? The question kept repeating itself on her head now. So many answers clogging her judgement to pick only one. Some answers had her father’s voice. Some had her mother’s. Only one had hers, and it just told her that it was an overdue topic for her. The memory of a little girl starting to form on her head. A little girl she had wanted as a friend back when she was on her first year of middle school. A little girl that made her heart flutter with just a touch and made her knees go weak with a smile. Both things she had known before, where associated with love and not friendship, but she had blinded herself to think that she was not gay because her parents said so and they also said that they knew better so…

Boys had never made her feel like that girl had. Not even the most handsome one she had met. She recalled a lot being introduced to her by her father’s business associates yet, no one caught her attention, except for one, but it had been because the little fool had fallen on a puddle when he tried to impress her with his “amazing wrestling skills”. Even now, the memory brought a chuckle to her.

Yet, after remembering all this, she still wasn’t clear. She had fallen in love in a time when you’re just curious about the feeling and then she had never again felt that. How could she be sure that it had been love and not just her curiosity trying to explore something new? Exploring the rebellious thought that was to be with another woman. She couldn’t be sure.

“Here’s the tea.” The woman left a tray with two cups on the table and then sat again at her side. “Chamomile. Scorpia told me you like it a lot.” She nodded with a tender smile on her face, feeling a little bit moved by the thought that Perfuma already remembers a thing she likes when she was sure her parents wouldn’t be able to say even one.

“Perfuma… how did you know that you were… well… gay?” After asking, she turned her head to see the table, feeling as if she had asked something prohibited.

“I just never felt attracted to men. I could see them as friends, but nothing else. It was completely different with girls so, it was kind of easy for me to know.”

A long silence engulfed the room after the woman’s answer. It seemed to her like she had a lot of things to think about now, and they were all overdue because of her parents’ stupid way of raising her.

She could only pray that, whatever answer she found, would make her feel better with herself and not throw her to the floor again. She just wanted to be happy so, why was it so freaking hard?

* * *

**Adora**

After her lunch with her friends, she had gotten back home and told her grandma about her new dilemma; should she pursue a new relationship or should she just stay friends with Catra?

Obviously, she already knew Razz’s answer before she even asked her anything so, that didn’t really help her.

Glimmer had also been pushing her towards trying her luck with the dark haired girl. Their lunch time together at the company was now just a long conversation about creating a great plan to make the rich girl fall for her. Even Huntara had at one point joined in the creation of such an idiotic scheme. She had even thought that it would be nice to miss lunch for at least a day.

“You’ve got nothing to lose! You just started being friends with her.” The shorter girl spoke in a dramatic tone, as always, making a couple people on the cafeteria look at them.

“Pinky here is right, girl. If you already think she will say no, why not ask? She could either say what you already know or maybe surprise you saying yes.” The buff woman joined on the effort and she couldn’t help but groan in annoyance.

“I do not believe in luck. Even if I made a move, I would only do it once I know there’s an actual chance.” Now it was her pink haired friend that groaned in annoyance, but a thousand times more dramatically than her.

“I can’t believe it! How did you even get a girlfriend before? Love is not science, Adora. You don’t need to form a hypothesis or a theory before you go and experiment.” Huntara laughed at the weird analogy and she also chuckled before answering.

“Easy for you to tell. You have always been together with the person you love. Besides, Lonnie was the one who made the move before.” Her short friend sighed in defeat as she took another bite from her lunch.

“Fine. Suit yourself. I just hope you don’t end up alone because you’re looking for your exact opposite.” She was about to say something when her phone started to ring.

“Hello?” She answered with a neutral tone, not having recognized the number and thinking that it might be a sales person.

Her back straightened in her chair as they told her the reason for said call; her grandma was in the hospital again. She didn’t even wait to hear what had happened, hanging up the phone and getting up quickly, her gaze already on the door.

“Hey, everything okay, blondie?” The buff woman asked her with worry, getting up from her chair too and putting a hand on her shoulder.

“My grandma is in the hospital. I need to go.” She started walking towards the exit, feeling as if her lungs were not providing her with enough air and her stomach growing heavy with every second that passed.

“Wait! Take my car. I’ll let the boss know what happened.” Huntara threw her keychain at her and she got it without much trouble.

“Thank you.” She managed to say before she started walking again, not realizing that Glimmer was walking behind her.

“I’m coming with you.” Her friend said as she finished wiping her mouth. She turned to tell her it was not necessary, but before she could say anything, the shorter girl spoke again. “You’re not going alone again, I don’t care what you say. My dad can cover for me.” With a nod, she started walking faster, getting to the parking lot as quickly as humanly possible without running.

And, as she drove towards the hospital, her mind kept telling her that everything was going to be alright. Just another little scare and her grandma would be baking pies again in a couple of days. She probably just slipped and couldn’t get up so she called an ambulance. Yeah, that had to be it. No reason to worry.

“It’s gonna be okay, Adora. Your grandma is really strong. I’m pretty sure we all will die before her.” Her friend took her out of her thoughts, squeezing her shoulder in support. And at her words, she could only laugh, masking the nervousness that engulfed her body.

“You’re right. She’s like a tree. She will live hundreds of years.” They both giggled and then fell silent until they reached their destination, parking the car in the first spot she saw and getting out of it as if it was on fire, running towards the building.

In no time, she was already asking at the reception for her grandma and, as if she had been put on auto pilot, her legs moved instantly when she got an answer, trying not to run and to calm herself on the way there.

Her grandma had been put into a split room and, if her experience in hospitals with Razz could tell her something was that shared rooms were not for critical patients since those usually got a room for themselves given the urgency of their states.

She saw the sign for her grandma’s room a few meters before getting there, a little calmer thanks to the realization of the previous fact, but still rattled and feeling as if her body was moving by itself.

A doctor came out of the room before she could even get there and she quickly approached him, asking her a thousand questions in less than a second.

“Relax. She’s stable for now. We gave her something to help her rest and we will take her to some tests in a couple hours.” The woman’s words made her find a little relief, letting go of a breath she didn’t know she had been holding.

“What happened to her?” She asked, feeling her body, cold with nervousness, starting to gain warmth again.

“She fell down the stairs of your house. Externally, I can only see a couple of bruises and I can feel a broken rib, but if I’m being honest, I think there might be more internal… complications. She’s an old lady, after all.” Her heart sunk at the words, especially at the first thing she said.

The only stairs in her place were the ones that took them to the roof and the purpose of that roof is just to hang the clean clothes to get them dry quickly. Her grandma had not went up in a long time, since she had helped her with her laundry every time she asked, but she didn’t yesterday. She had felt so tired from work and college that she told her grandma she would wash her clothes today and, Razz, being the stubborn and kind hearted woman that she is, decided not to give her any more trouble and wash her own clothes, ending in the tragedy that they were now experiencing.

“How bad?” She asked, her hands trembling without her knowledge.

“I can’t tell until we have the results, but I want you to be prepared for everything. Like I said: she’s an old lady and her body is more fragile than it was before.” Her look fell to the floor as she nodded in understanding.

“Can I see her?” She asked without even thinking, as if her body had just expressed her desires without filter.

“Not now. She needs to rest. Maybe after the tests.” She felt a hand on her shoulder and turned to look at her right, where Glimmer was standing and looking at her with an encouraging smile, as if trying to tell her that everything would be alright. “I have to go, but a nurse will be coming shortly to check up on her again.”

She didn’t even feel the doctor leaving nor did she see her go, her gaze pointed at the floor and her senses turned off because of her nervousness and growing fear.

The last thing she remembered from that day was the doctor and a nurse taking her grandma to the x-ray machine and her pink haired friend trying to tell her something about calling Bow. Everything else was just a blur.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I'm back and on time again!
> 
> I didn't have much time to re-read the chapter as much as I like too so, I just have to hope there are not many mistakes there (especially in the last part), but whatever.
> 
> I think many of you already know what's going to happen (some of you even knew before), and I know all of you think I'm kind of a dick for that, but I promise you a happy ending, like always. 
> 
> Anyway; thank you so much for reading, for your kudos and comments. I hope you're enjoying the story as much as I'm enjoying writing it!
> 
> See you next week!
> 
> Also: I wrote this chapter while listening to Enforcer and the title comes from their song, "City Lights".


	12. Tired of Being Alive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adora has the worst day of her life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this chapter while listening to Danzig and the title comes from their song, "Tired of Being Alive".

# Chapter 12 – Tired of Being Alive

**Adora**

It had been twenty four hours since she arrived to the hospital. Her grandma had been moved to a personal room and she hadn’t woken up either, both things raised concern for her.

She had kept herself awake with a lot of unhealthy liters of coffee, with too much sugar to keep her energy high, waiting for the results of the tests they made on Razz.

Her mind was an unstoppable whirlwind of thoughts ever since they had moved her grandma to a new room. She felt as if she was not even awake and all of it was just a dream she was witnessing.

“Good afternoon, Miss. We finally got the results for the tests.” A jolt of energy went through her body as soon as she saw the doctor entering the room with a folder on her hands, expecting to hear some good news and feeling her anxiety eating her from the inside. She got up from the chair and walked towards her, but she stopped her and signaled for her to sit down again. Not a good sign.

“What is it? Is she going to be okay?” The doctor sat beside her in the free chair, looking at her with a sympathetic look. Also, not a good sign.

“I’m really sorry. It seems that the hit she took to her head got her brain really swollen. A contusion this big can usually go away with some meds and a couple weeks of rest but, as I told you yesterday, she’s an old lady. The blood test shows that her blood has not enough oxygen and her lungs were already damaged due to her old age. Knowing this, I can tell you that, instead of getting better, her brain will get more and more swollen due to the lack of oxygen. All we can do now is give her some pain killers and make her comfortable but, I have to be honest to you: I don’t think she will be with us tomorrow.” As she heard the doctor, each word made her heart sink more and more.

“Are you sure?” A whisper came out of her mouth as she felt a knot taking place on her throat.

“Sadly, I am. If she were ten years younger, maybe we could get her to surgery but, with this results, I can tell you that surgery will only cause more damage. I apologize.” She felt the doctor stand up while she looked at the floor, trying to process everything. “She might wake up before she… before she’s gone so, I’ll tell the nurses to let you stay in here after visiting hours, just in case.” The doctor’s voice sounded far away, as if it came from an old record with lots of reverb on it. Her mind was suddenly blank, as if she had fallen asleep without knowing, but she knew that was not the case because she could still hear the machines and people walking and talking outside of the room.

For hours, she just sat there, with a knot on her throat, breathing slowly, feeling tears on her face and her heart beating slowly and painfully on her chest.

“Adora…” She jumped out of the chair when she heard her grandma’s voice calling her, wiping the tears from her face with her hand.

“Hey. How’re you feeling?” Taking the old lady’s hand, she sat in the bed with her.

“Fine. Better than ever. I could run a marathon right now.” A sad smile appeared on her face, knowing her grandma was lying to avoid worrying her.

“You will be okay. You’ve gone through worse. I’m sure I’ll die before you.” Razz chuckled at her comment and squeezed her hand.

“Adora, I know I’m dying.” Her smile was gone quickly, replaced with a frown of worry.

“Did you hear the doctor?” The old lady shook her head slightly.

“No. I can feel it and… there are a lot of things I want to tell you before I leave.” She felt her heart being smashed for a second there.

“I’m all ears.” Her voice came out broken, the knot returning to her throat.

“Then, let me tell you a story about a little girl. She felt she was loved by no other human being. She was always alone. She always felt the pain. She worked very hard. She never lost the faith.” She couldn’t help but chuckle as tears fell down her cheeks again. It was She-ra’s story. The same one she had read to her many times when she was a child.

“Working hard. Learning all. Studying to improve her life.” She continued the story, filling in the parts like she used to when she was a child, watching her grandma smile.

“A town was not that big for an ambitious little girl. She moved away, to a city where she felt her dreams could be not only a hope, but a reality she wanted to live in.” Her grandma squeezed her hand again as more tears came out of her eyes.

“Lost in the streets. Afraid of life, but working for a better day.” Razz giggled softly, taking her hand to the blonde’s cheek, caressing it carefully.

“You still remember it.” She put her hand on top of her grandma’s.

“Of course. We read it every day for years.” They both giggled now, followed by a silence that didn’t last long.

“Do you know why no one else has ever heard about She-ra?” The old woman asked her and she shook her head. “Because your mom, Mara, wrote that story.” She looked at her grandma with surprise as she felt her hand falling from her cheek to the mattress, where she took it again. “She wanted to be a writer. The story of She-ra, the princess of power, was a prologue for her first book that she never got to finish. Can you guess what that book was going to be about?” She shook her head again without saying anything, not wanting to interrupt Razz. “She wanted to write my story. How I came to the city with nothing but a bag of clothes and made a life here. Obviously, she wanted to end that book with a fantasy about me getting rich, which we know didn’t happen.” A chuckle came out of her mouth, followed by a sigh.

Her grandma’s smile faded as they fell into a long silence, only filled by the other noises in the hospital, dampened due to the walls surrounding them.

“I…” She was about to say something, but got interrupted by Razz.

“Adora, there’s something you need to know. I’ve kept it from you because I thought you would hate me if you knew. Hell! I was even willing to die without telling you but, I don’t think that would be fair so, listen carefully.” She arched a brow in confusion but didn’t interrupt her. “It’s about your family… the rich one.” She nodded slowly, as if telling her grandma to go on. “A few years before you were born, your mom married the love of her life. A nice young lady called Light Hope.”

“Didn’t you say I had a dad?” She couldn’t help but ask, not even thinking about it.

“I did and you do. As you know, two girls can’t have children of their own. Light Hope came from Eternia, that country where I’ve told you your family lives. Her parents were friends with a rich couple that was unable to have children. Once they confirmed that the one with the problem was the woman, they started to look for someone who could lend them their uterus to carry his child. When they found out that their friend’s daughter was gay, they came here and made them an offer: they would both be artificially inseminated in exchange for a lot of money and he would get to keep and raise the children with her wife.” Adora couldn’t believe what she was listening, but she refrained from making a comment until her grandma was done. “This happened during a very serious crisis in this country. I lost my job when the company I worked for went to bankruptcy and so did Mara. I knew I wouldn’t be able to get another job since I was already sixty years old and my pension wouldn’t be enough of us. Light Hope had a god job, but it would have been tough still. Also, they did want to have a kid of their own so, they made a different deal; both of them would get pregnant and they would keep one of the kids. The man accepted and they started trying to get pregnant.

After the first try, Mara got pregnant, but Light Hope never could. It seemed like, just like the man’s wife, she was infertile. But then, an amazing thing happened; Mara was carrying twins. And so, the agreement was kept.

When you were born, they came to take you, but since there were complications during the pregnancy, the doctor advised Mara that it would be better if she kept you and your brother with her for a couple months.

On the last day, the day you were supposed to go away, the man and his wife invited my girls to celebrate and took them to a fancy restaurant, but he had a drink too many and… you know what happened next.

The four of them died that night. I lost my little girl that night…” A tear ran down Razz’s cheek and she sobbed a little before continuing. “The man’s family wanted me to give them both of you, since they thought that had been the agreement they had, they even threatened me with lawyers because I didn’t want to let any of you go. You both were the last thing I had of her, of my beautiful girl so, of course I wanted you both to stay with me. Sadly, I couldn’t do it. They sued me and I had to give them your brother, but I fought harder to keep you. You looked just like her.” Her grandma’s hand caressed her cheek again as she tried to fight the tears from coming out. “My selfishness is the reason you had to grow in poverty. You could have lived like a princess, but I couldn’t let you go. I’m sorry, Adora.” Without thinking it twice, she lowered her body to hug Razz, tears starting to pool in her eyes.

“You don’t have to apologize. I don’t care if we had to eat beans and bread every day. I have always been happy because you’re with me. I’m glad you were selfish.” They hugged for a long while, both of them crying loudly and trying to make the most of that hug since they both knew it could be the last one they shared.

After a long while, the old woman stopped crying and they broke the hug.

“There’s something else you need to know.” The blonde stood up to get some tissues from a table in front of the bed to clean their faces and sat back on the bed once she got them.

“What is it?” She took a couple of tissues and handed them to her grandma.

“The money they paid for the agreement is still there. I never touched it. I wanted to give it to you so that you could go to college but, I chickened out and couldn’t tell you about it once you finished high school. That’s something else I have to apologize for.” She wiped her face and then cleared her throat, taking her grandma’s hand again.

“I don’t care about the money. You don’t have to apologize for anything. I’m only grateful that I got to be with you. I wouldn’t have been happier anywhere else.” As the words left her mouth, she remembered the reason she was saying it and started to cry again, hugging her grandma tight to find some comfort.

“I am really happy too. You are such an amazing woman now. I know you will accomplish great things and, if anyone dares to say that you won’t, punch them in the face, they deserve it. You are now the mighty She-ra and you will succeed.” The warmth from her grandma’s embrace made her remember when she was a scared kid and Razz hugged her to make her feel better. That and so many other memories. She didn’t want her to leave yet, but she knew there was nothing she could do.

“Can you tell me the story of She-ra again?” She whispered in her grandma’s ear trying to hold her cries.

“Of course. Let me tell you a story about a little girl…” And as the story kept going, Razz’s voice was getting lower and lower until she couldn’t hear it anymore. All she could hear was herself crying and the ECG machine telling her that her grandma’s heart had stopped beating.

She didn’t move from her side for a long while, knowing that there was nothing the doctors could do and trying to get as much warmth from her as she could.

After what felt like only a few seconds for her, a nurse came in running and followed her procedure.

The only thing she could do was watch as they confirmed her death and then took away that beautiful old lady that had given everything for her. The lady that had went through hunger in order to feed her. The lady that always wore old clothes in order to buy her new clothes. The lady that was her entire world. The lady she was letting down right now, because she didn’t feel strong like she taught her to be.

Indeed, that lady had been the most beautiful being in the world and, even though she was gone now, she knew she would never forget about her. Her laugh, her smile, her warmth, they would always be engraved into her mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey. I know; it's been a while.
> 
> Last time I told you I was moving to a new city and well, things didn't work out. So many bad things happened that I would have to write a bible to list them all.
> 
> This chapter specifically took a toll on me. I was going to write it in memory of my grandpa, who died a few years ago, but I ended up writing it in memory of my grandma too, since she passed away a couple weeks ago. 
> 
> Not only did I write this to feel closer to them again, but to have some catharsis too. I've been feeling really bad lately. Like I told you, a succession of awful things have been happening to me lately and I really feel like shit.
> 
> I finally took refugee again in the things I love, like making music, drawing and writing and, even if I don't feel much better yet, it has been getting better. 
> 
> There are only like a couple chapters left on the story, but I don't really know when I will be able to write them. Like I said, things aren't working out in this city so, in a month, I'm gonna move back to where I used to live. I just wrote this chapter because I felt like I needed to do it and, in the end, it did made me feel a little better. 
> 
> I apologize for not replying to your comments and also, thank you so much for reading! I hope I can be back soon to give you that Catradora you're waiting for.


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